


The Calm Before the Storm

by DVNTYRCS



Category: The Bold Type
Genre: F/F, The Bold Type - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-30
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2018-12-21 22:12:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 31,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11953713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DVNTYRCS/pseuds/DVNTYRCS
Summary: Kat Edison and Adena El-Amin are in a relationship and newly living together. This takes place at least 6 mos or more in the future.You'll find I added and rearranged the chapters. CHAPTER 8 is new.





	1. Home

**Author's Note:**

> I welcome all feedback and general Kadena conversation. If anything I'm using this as a springboard to explore conversations between the characters that I would like to see.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. They belong to someone who is not me. Check out The Bold Type on Freeform.  
> 2nd Disclaimer: Adena's home country was never explicitly named so I gave her one in Iran.

Rolling up her prayer rug, Adena heard the teakettle whistle from the kitchen and knew Kat was up. She was prepping the french press as she did most Saturday mornings. Adena placed the sacred rug into a wooden bench and removed her hijab before leaving her prayer room to head into the kitchen area. The first thing she saw was Kat’s long curly hair defying gravity in the way she loved especially right after waking. She looked half asleep bumping around in her black BANG IT LIKE A # sleeping shirt. Adena scoffed and rolled her eyes the first time she wore it to bed. Kat knew that despite her reaction it secretly amused her.

Bending over, peering into the refrigerator. “Are we out of creamer?”

“Probably.” Adena passed her girlfriend from behind, sliding a hand over her back as she went. Kat never kept track of food in the house. She was used to eating out and ordering takeout. Adena opened a top cabinet and pulled down a can of coconut milk. “You can use this until we make it to the store,” handing it over to her girlfriend.

Kat examined the can before hunching her shoulders. “Thanks baby.” She leaned in and kissed her before returning to the coffee situation. Adena left Kat to her own devices while she took up residence on the couch. 

Kat finished preparing both of their coffees and headed over to the couch where she handed one off to Adena. They’ve been living together for a little over three weeks now and everything was still new.

The artist took a small sip eyeing Kat as she sat beside her. She waited for the woman to become more alert before saying, “Maman wants to meet you.” 

Kat paused for a moment, then scrunched her nose, “Is she okay with the whole girl on girl thing?” motioning between them with her mug.

Adena smiled into her to mug,“Please don’t say that around her.” 

“She doesn’t speak english” she quipped taking another satisfying sip of her coffee. The coconut milk wasn’t half bad.

“She speaks enough.” Adena could see the wheels turning in her girlfriend’s big beautiful brown eyes. “And yes, sort of.” 

“Sort of?” Kat wondered what that really meant. She never gave full thought about Adena’s family acceptance of her sexuality especially her mother’s. They spoke constantly. She assumed all was good.

“She did not understand in the beginning.” Adena placed her mug down on the coffee table, returning her full attention to the woman next to her. “ And now I’m not sure if she still doesn’t but she has come to accept it. She knows this is a permanent part of who I am.”

“She wants you to go home.” It was a statement disguised as a question. Her tone betraying her concern. It seemed to happen more of late when talks of visiting home comes up.

The artist feeling the shift reached out for Kat’s free hand and held it. “She loves when I come home but worries when I’m there.”

“Well, that’s two things we have in common.” Kat’s facial expression was sobering. She was sufficiently awake and decided to abandon what remains of her coffee on the table. She then took a beat before taking Adena’s hand again and catching her eyes. “I’m terrified when you go home to visit.” She was scared anytime she left the country. Suddenly Kat had the urge to find her phone and check twitter for any Iranian news. “The media attention on your work has increased so much over the past few months.”

Adena wanted to say “you don’t have to worry.” She knew it seemed scary from the outside looking in but Iran was her home. It would always be her home even if she didn’t think she had any type of future there. Kat couldn’t hear that right now. She knew she’d worry regardless of what she said, so she let it be. “And the second thing.”

Kat grinned. “Well isn’t it obvious?” 

Never letting go of her girlfriend’s hand, she pulls in closer to her body. “I’d like to hear you say it.”

Lips inches apart, Kat coos “I love you” before pressing her lips into Adena’s. 

Adena pulls back teasingly “Say it again.”

“I love you” she said once more before leaning Adena onto her back and kissing her again. Her lips were more urgent finding more purchase as she went. The kiss naturally waned not yet ready to commit to the promise of more. She hovered over Adena as the woman cups the sides of her face. “I don’t want anything to happen to you.” Kat’s piercing stare took Adena off guard. The director had ways of disarming the woman beneath her with a simple look. “When you’re gone my heart stops and I can’t breathe again until I hear your voice and know that you’re okay.”

Adena knew that fear all too well herself accept it was aimed in Kat’s direction. Adena inhales Kat as she pulls her into her body and holds her in her arms. Everytime Kat opened up to her she couldn’t help but fall a little deeper. She wanted to wrap Kat’s heart with silk and place it in safe space for keeping.

Kat began nipping at the artist’s jawline before whispering, “So Is this where you take me home to meet the family?”

“Nooooooo.” The very thought of Kat in Iran made her anxious.

“Well damn.” The young woman pulls back. “Alright.”

“Oh love. It’s not you…”

“It is me.” Kat felt Adena’s grip tighten around her waist.

“Mon coeur.” Kat was so easily wounded if she felt rejected. She was so fearless to the outside world and yet so tender-hearted. She wondered if her friends knew how easily she hurt or was it only her who got to see. “No it’s the government.” 

“I can cover myself and stay out of trouble.” 

Adena didn’t want to see her covered in a hijab. “I know, it’s not that. Mon coeur, your social media presence and power could be a problem. If my government connected you, your job, and me together who knows what could happen. You don’t have to do anything they just have to think you are.”

That was the crux of the problem, the director thought. Leaving the apartment seemed to give the world free reign to intrude on their relationship. “I don’t want to put you in harm’s way.” Kat settled into the crook of Adena’s neck as her eyes fluttered shut.

“You could never.” Adena could feel her girlfriend’s breathing slow and even out. “Besides it’s a moot point. Maman asked me not to come home right now. There is some political upheaval.” 

“Anything to be concerned about?”

Adena sighed as she could feel Kat’s heart rate pick up. “More of the usual. A wave of crackdowns on political opposition.”

“This is your periodic reminder you could afford to be more careful.” Kat was serious. 

“I’m always careful,” she reminded. Then Adena felt a hand snake underneath her shirt and ghost across her breasts eliciting a lick of the lips.

“Yes when you’re not allowing some gorgeous wayward girl influence you into recklessness.” Kat’s hand slipped back down to her girlfriend’s hip.

“I like how you just complimented yourself.” 

A light laughter bubbled up from Kat, still refusing to open her eyes.

“It’s not your fought that I was detained. I was already on their radar.”

Kat hated for reality to seep into her lazy weekend mornings. She reluctantly opened her eyes. “Yeah but…”

“No buts.” The artist got up and straddled Kat, making sure to catch her eyes. “I make my own decisions.”

“I know.” Kat hands instinctively went to her waist as they’ve done a hundreds of times. She liked the weight of her body on top of hers. It settled her restless energy.

Adena’s head cocked to the side, “Do you?” Because sometimes she wasn’t so sure. “And if anything I’m the cautious one in this relationship.”

“Cautious,” Kat repeated. It made her think back to the beginning. “You made me chase you?” 

An incredulous “Excuse me?” escaped Adena’s lips.

The director teased wanting to incite a response. “You seduced me and then made me chase you.” 

A slender finger poked Kat in her side eliciting a sharp laughter. “I reject that.” 

“You knew I was attracted to you.” Kat playfully tugged at Adena’s drawstring on her linen pants forcing the bow to disentangle. She began to have thoughts of what lies underneath.

“Yes.” Adena felt two fingers play at the edge of her panty line. “I’ve wanted you since that night.” 

They both knew the night. That very first night. Tea, candlelight, vibrators. “I knew it. But you were all, ‘That wasn’t a come on?’” doing her best Adena impersonation.

“I wasn’t,” the pitchiness in her voice betraying her. 

“So why did you need to know my sexual orientation?”

Adena started to open her mouth and then promptly closed it and smiled.

Kat felt a little vindicated after all this time. “I knew it.”

“I’m glad you were brave enough for the both of us.” The artist intertwined their fingers. She studied both of their hands, palm to palm. There has always been this energy between them. When they were together, on the same page, they were impenetrable. But even when they weren’t, they would still do anything for the other. “But you take risks even when I wish you wouldn’t.”

The social media director took stock of their hands and the pensive look that reflected back at her. “Do I scare you?”

“Never…. but if I'm honest, I’m scared for you. I love that you fight for what you want and what you think is right.” 

“So do you.”

“But the fight in you is so strong that I worry it’s going to get you hurt. That being with me is going to get you hurt. You worry when I go back home. I worry when we’re here and out together. I feel like being with me has invited more hate into your life. And you don’t know how to back down from a fight.”

“I don’t like feeling powerless.”

“No one does but the fight isn’t worth it if it keeps you from coming home.”

“You punch one racist.” Kat rolls her eyes and smiles but she knew she did a stupid thing. The hate in that man’s eyes. Then the police showing up out of nowhere like that. Adena gone. No one to tell her side of things if something went wrong. She was alone. She had a panic attack in the back of squad car. She didn’t tell anyone that not Adena and not her parents.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for leaving you to deal with that alone.” Adena knew that situation was anything but funny.

“We don’t have to talk about it again.” She tried to avoid thinking about that night. “I get it I really do.” Kat wondered if kissing her would stop this conversation as she stared at Adena’s mouth.

“And I want you to know I get it now too.” Adena knew racism was a problem in the US. It was a problem in the world. Living here was a different story though; she soon realized how they experienced racism differently. “I would never under any circumstance leave you like that again.” Kat closed her eyes and Adena knew she would start shutting down. “I won’t do that to you. I’m in this with you. Mon coeur, look at me?” Adena waited for her to open her eyes, she needed for her to hear her. “You know It’s okay if you’re not okay. You don’t have to always have to be strong.” 

The artist wiped away a rogue tear that slid down the side of her love’s face.

The curly haired woman decided that was enough sharing for one morning. She propped herself up on both elbows and began kissing Adena like she had a destination in mind. Soon she felt Adena pull back. 

“You know that, right?”

Kat saw the concern in her girlfriend’s eyes causing her to take a cleansing breath and recalibrate. “Yes and I promise to never put you in the position where you have to choose between your safety or mine.” 

This thing between them was so weird to Kat when she examined it up close. On paper, them two here like this was improbable for so many reasons. And yet every time she looks into her eyes the universe collapses in on itself and gives way to this indescribable sensation. She couldn’t see past Adena. Is this what they call ‘stupid in love’ she wondered. 

Adena registered that look in Kat’s eyes. It was uncensored and it was making her wet. 

“You wear too many clothes.” Kat reversed their positions. 

Adena laughed as Kat sent her pants along with her underwear flying across the room with great glee. However, her favorite part was watching her girlfriend pull that oversized shirt over her head discarding it somewhere that didn’t quite matter right now. Her hands explored the expanse of bare skin that was laid out before her.

Adena smirked when Kat settled in-between her legs and said, “foreplay? Or No foreplay.” She knew what that meant. She shook her head and her voice dropped an octave, “No foreplay.” Kat readjustment and Adena’s eyes closed briefly as two fingers enter her painfully slow. The look in her eyes told Adena she could forget about working this morning. Adena’s breathing began to quicken and sounded more labored as Kat went on. She forced her eyes to stay open for as long as she could physically manage. She enjoyed watching her girlfriend do things to her. She was successful for a while until Kat shifted the angle of her hand to use her thumb more efficiently.

Kat could feel muscles began to tighten around her fingers. 

Adena was close. 

Eyes slowly shut as they rolled behind her head. 

So close. They both felt it.

Kat licked Adena’s lips after which she was granted entrance. Her tongue dipped in and out of her lover's mouth in time with her hand. 

Adena clawed at Kat’s back with one hand and cupped her head from the back with other. Fusion. She forced Kat to stop the teasing and kiss her the way she liked when she was on verge of coming undone. Deep, languid kisses that could be felt in her toes. Her soothing warm mouth on her own. The weight of her body keeping her from floating away. Two bodies in motion coming together. Then like a dying sun, she begins to break down and come apart. Fission. She couldn’t maintain this state. It was unstable and demanded she call out as liquid heat flooded her center and washed over her like a wave of lava crashing into itself as sounds of pleasure erupts.

Then the cooling. The slowing of breaths. Sensitivity to touch.

Adena’s hands releasing Kat. 

Kat extracting her self with great care..

Adena was jellied.

Kat was pleased.

“Don’t look too smug. You’re next.”

\----------------------------------

Two hours later.

Both women were naked sprawled out on the living room Persian rugs breathing labored. 

 

Kat smiled through her heaving breaths. She loved sex. It helped her think clearly. “Babe, were you saying something about your mother?” 

“Yeah. She’s coming to visit."


	2. Recollection - 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adena recalls a memory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place after Peru but before they move in together.

Adena was supposed to be writing a grant proposal in an attempt to secure funding for a new ambitious mixed-media project. Firuze came across the information and felt she had a solid chance of securing it. It would be a huge get. So she was in her studio but instead of pulling the information together to bang out a stellar proposal she was recalling the first time Kat walked around her New York apartment in the nude after they returned from Peru.

 

She was having her morning coffee when a freshly showered Kat padded out of the bathroom naked looking confused as she headed into Adena’s bedroom. A few minutes past before Kat emerged once more from the bedroom still very much naked. “I can’t find my panties. Have you seen them?”

“No.” The artist was amused that her girlfriend seemed to manage to lose her underwear at a rate that defies logic. Most of the time she winds up finding them behind the dresser or in between cushions, except for one elusive pair.

Kat grabbed her jeans off of the sofa and slid them on. “I’ll buy a pair on the way to work if I have time.”

“How many times is this going to happen?” She smirked. “I’m starting to think you intentionally lose your underwear so you have an excuse to go commando.”

Kat said “Maybe I leave them on purpose to let all of your little groupies know to keep it in their pants.” with a cheeky grin.

Quirked eyebrow. “Jealous?” Adena handed her the black lace bra she wore last night that somehow ended up on top of the refrigerator.

“Thanks.” She quickly put it on and hooked it together. “You know I don’t do jealous,” She said heading back into Adena’s bedroom.“You mind if I wear one of your tanks babe?”

“Go ahead.” She secretly enjoyed Kat wearing her clothing. She particularly liked the way she filled out the burgundy tank top she chose.” She wasn’t ready to say it but she wanted to spend every night with Kat. “When you return tonight how about you bring extra underwear to keep here.”

“Adena El Amin is that your way of telling me you want me to stay again tonight?”

“Yeah.” In that moment the artist could think about how smitten she was with Kat. She loved her, there was no denying it. It was hard not sleeping with her every night ever since Peru.

Kat covered the distance until they stood face to face. She peered down into her eyes before saying “Okay” and kissing her.

Adena pulled away acutely aware that Kat would be late for work if they kept going in this fashion. “You should get going.” Slapping her on the ass for good measure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback feeds me. I haven't abandoned this story despite the long absence. I'm actually working on more story despite myself. I posted this as a thank you for those who will stick it out with me. For those who have left feedback thanks.


	3. When the Past Comes Calling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An old friend becomes the topic of conversation. lmao!

They both were tired. Kat had been at the office late every night this week in preparation for New York fashion week. Adena had been stressing over readying preparations for her mother’s visit and simultaneously keep her shooting schedule for her latest installation. They hadn’t spent much time together in the past three weeks other than sleeping in the same bed.

Kat wanted to be with Adena when she went to the airport to get her mother but she needed to work. There was no way around it. She got in around 9:30 pm. She knew Adena was irritable but they talked about this. Then after what seemed like awkward introductions, she confirmed with Adena that her mother was set up in her room and had everything she needed. 

The social media director was happy to retire to her room as Adena went back to talking to her mother. She plopped down on the bed; ready to collapse but wanted to check Scarlett’s social media sites before doing so. Adena’s phone was the closest device so she unlocked the screen to get started. Her finger stopped when she noticed a call from Coco. 

The artist entered the bedroom and noticed Kat still fully dressed with her shoes on no less. “Dilaam, why didn’t you take your shoes off?” 

The tired woman didn’t register her question, tossing the phone back onto the bed. “I didn’t realize you and Coco were still in contact?” Her head angled towards the phone for emphasis.

“Kat.” 

“Are you going to call her back?” 

She noted how Kat wouldn’t look at her. “I don’t know, probably. It could be important.” Adena looked from Kat to her phone and back to Kat again. “Were you checking my phone?”

“No. My battery died and so I was using your phone to check Scarlett’s twitter page to make sure my team is rolling out the new campaign effectively. I didn’t feel like…wait why am I explaining? You usually don’t have a problem with me using your phone.” She stopped and took a cleansing breath. “ I don’t like where this conversation is headed.”

“I don’t either.” Her arms crossed as her weight shifted to her left leg. 

“When was the last time you heard from her?”

“When I was in Peru.” She could see the wheels turning, “before you joined me.” There was a flicker of emotion that fleeted across that face she adores. Adena unfurled her arms and gestured to her love, “Say what you want to say.”

“When you came back to New York were you two completely done?” 

“Yes.” She sat next to Kat. 

“What did she want?”

“To try again.” Adena watched Kat turn to look at her for the first time since Coco came up. She was searching her eyes for something. What, Adena wasn’t sure. “I told her no.”

“I don’t like you talking to her.” 

“Do you think something is going on between us?” 

Again Kat turned away. “Do you make a habit out of keeping in touch with your exes?” 

Kat was deflecting and she only did that when she felt sensitive about something. Adena knew her but she thought Kat knew her as well. “Do you think I would cheat on you with her?”

All Kat could hear was Adena saying she wasn’t a cheater after their first night together. “Do you?” whispered by Adena brought Kat back to the present. 

The director’s response time was too slow for Adena’s comfort and made her feel a way. She stood.

“I think I’m too tired to talk about this right now.” Kat’s frame fell back onto the bed. She shut her eyes tight. 

“If not now, when?” The ire was rising in Adena.

Kat loved the sound of Adena’s voice. Her soft Persian-French accent. Low tone. She couldn’t get enough of it, except in this moment, she wanted Adena to be silent. “I don’t know, Adena,” Kat whined. “ I’m exhausted, can this wait?”

“Until when?” The artist’s voice was tense but measured. “We’ve barely seen or talk to each other and we live together.” Her frustration was etched into her face.

“You know I’m working. This is the job. It won’t always be like this.” 

“We need to talk. This is important.”

The tired woman pushed up on her elbows and eyed her girlfriend. “Do you really want to have this conversation this late with your mother across the hall because I don’t.”

“You’re always too tired to talk but never too tired to have sex. It’s funny how that works.” 

Kat wondered if she was trying to start a fight as she returned to her original sitting position.

“At least Coco would talk to me.” As soon as it left her mouth she wished she could take it back.

“Well, I’m not Coco.” The wounded woman’s voice went cold. “So if you wanted her you should have stayed with her.” She felt like shit as it was she didn’t need this. She walked pass Adena, leaving the bedroom 

“Wait. Where are you going?” 

……………

Kat stared at the door before she walked over to the kitchen island to get her phone. 

Adena watched Kat wordlessly as she started to show all of the signs she was about to do one of the things she promised not to do. 

Run, the thought was a visceral one. She needed not to be here, right now, feeling this way. She felt it in her being she needed to leave. She immediately locked in on what she needed. Her purse was next to her phone and her blue blazer next to the door. She could simply walk out but she remembered her promise. But what Adena didn’t understand was that she couldn’t trust herself to stay when feeling like this. She would say something that would make her wish she would have just left instead. She had trouble containing herself and had a habit of saying what was on her mind even when inappropriate.

Kat placed her phone in her back pocket and picked up her purse. She made it to the door and heard her name being called.

“Kat?” Disbelief colored her words, “You’re for real walking out on me right now.”

She turned. Adena was standing there in front of her with an embattled look in her eyes. They stood there for a long moment before Adena seemed to resign herself to whatever came next and walked away. 

Kat watched her walk into their bedroom and shut the door. Her hand found itself unlocking the front door and cracking it open. So much was floating around in her head. Coco, the promise, the fear, work. Tears began to flow despite her best efforts to hold them back. She hated that she cried so easily especially when frustrated and tired. “Damn it” she mumbled under her breath. 

………………………...

Adena closed the bedroom door behind her.

She crawled into their well-made bed and smiled as she took in the expanse of the room. This was the room Kat put herself into most. For all of Kat’s cravings for imperfection, she was one of the cleanest and most organized people she knew. She made the bed most mornings and today was no different.

The artist heard the front door close. “And she’s off” She laughed as she heard a door close and tears began to roll out of the corners of her eyes and down the sides of her face. Today was supposed to be a good day. Her mother is here but she’s in their bedroom crying over her girlfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oohh so what's going to happen? 
> 
> I find that I have problems getting into Adena's head so if the story feels imbalanced that may be one of the reasons.
> 
> Also, I have no beta so all mistakes are mine. 
> 
> Feedback is welcome and I will be happy to respond to any questions.


	4. Understanding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fight comes to a close, one way or another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this was way too long even for me. Thanks for reading. All mistakes are mine.

Kat stood in the corridor of the apartment; head pressed against the side of the front door. Adena’s mother came out of what would be her room for the next two weeks and watched her. Kat was fighting herself and Mrs. El Amin could see the moment she let go of the fight. Her shoulders slumped. She closed the door. She was clearly embarrassed when she realized who was watching her. The nervous way she swiped the tears from her face made that clear.

‘I’m sorry” She was not sure why she was apologizing. She wondered how much Adena’s mother heard.

Mrs. El Amin didn’t say anything only looked at her but all Kat saw was Adena’s eyes peering back at her. 

Kat couldn’t decipher if the response was due to a language barrier or judgment. She glanced behind her in the direction of her and Adena’s bedroom. She was not ready to head there yet.

Then there was Adena’s mother who was silently judging her at least that’s what she decided. How could she not, given this as her first impression? And even with feeling like she was under a microscope, Kat knew she could handle Adena mother’s judgy silence over her girlfriend's incessant need to talk. 

“Would you like some tea?” Kat’s question was met with more silence. “I can also get you water, coffee, or juice.” Great, she thought, now both El-Amin’s were pissed at her.

“Tea is fine.” Mrs. El Amin accent was thick but her enunciation clear. 

“Tea it is.” the young woman sat her purse back down along with her blazer.

Adena’s mother followed Kat to the kitchen and waited as she carefully brought out her Adena’s silver tea set. 

Kat knew she was still learning Adena but she knew there were 4 possessions she held dear to her heart. Her Quran that was gifted to her by her grandmother. It belonged to her great-grandmother. Her camera. An old photo of her family and this silver Persian tea set.

She put on the water and extracted the imported tea leaves from the silver canister. Kat remembered that Adena said something about sometimes using other spices with the black tea. So she removed a few mason jars of various fresh spices and set it beside the loose leaf tea.

Mrs. El Amin pointed to the tea. “May I?” 

“Please. It’s all yours.” Kat stood back as she watched Mrs. El-Amin rummage through the cabinets and refrigerator. She allowed herself to take in the thin, graceful woman before her. Her hair was long and wavy coming to her mid back without her hijab. Her complexion was darker than Adena’s by a half of shade. 

Mrs. El Amin put a new pot to boil with spices. Before turning her attention to her daughter’s partner once more. “Ada says you’re a director of a magazine.” 

Kat gave a warm smile, “I’m the social media director of Scarlet magazine.” She went on to describe the details of her position.

“Sounds like you are very good at what you do.” The older woman smiled.

“I try.” The young woman leaned against the kitchen island. “Adena said you’re a photographer.”

“Yes but nothing like her. I shoot weddings, births, and such events.” She adjusted the flame of the stove burner to simmer the spices. 

“How did you come to know Ada?”

“Work.” Kat went on to explain the dynamics that lead to their paths crossing. 

When the older woman was finished 20 minutes later she handed Kat a large mug of chai. “This is Ada’s favorite. Take it to her.”

Kat didn’t want to but of course she did. She wasn’t going tell Adena’s mother no. 

……………

Kat knocked on the door stirring an emotionally drained Adena. ‘Maman?” From the bed, Adena called out in response. 

“No, it's me,” Kat replied before pushing open the door. She crossed the distance to the bed and sat on the edge next to her with the chai in hand. 

“I thought you left.” Adena sat up, folding her legs underneath her. 

Kat could tell she had been crying and felt guilty. “I promised I wouldn’t.” 

“But you wanted to.” It was a statement they both knew was true.

“Yeah, I did.” The young woman’s brown eyes locked on her girlfriend’s. “And so you know I do trust you.”

Adena released a breath she didn’t realize she was holding.

“I guess if I’m honest it’s about Coco but not really. The way we started.”

“I cheated,” she knew her girlfriend would tapdance around the word afraid of offending her.

Yeah, Kat thought. “But I was there with you fully aware you were with her. So, I don’t know how to make sense of it. I’ve never been that person and I didn’t like feeling that way.” 

“I should have ended things before things got as far as they did with us. I know.” She bowed her head knowing it was not one her proudest moments. “Over time it was easier to be countries apart then to break up.” Adena felt weak about it but her relationship with Coco with all its problems kept the loneliness from setting it and she told Kat as much. “Coco was my tether when I felt anchored to nothing and no one. Between all of my coming and goings, Coco was dependable. She was there when no one was. I didn’t want to lose that connection if you didn’t want to be with me.” She felt small saying that and she wondered what the woman before her was thinking. 

“You know when we talked about adventures, you seemed so taken with all of my travels. They taught me a great number of things but the other side of that was loneliness. I didn’t fit in Iran so I left. Suddenly I was a girl without a country, without a home. In the beginning, it was exciting and adventurous and other times...tiring. Before you, all I had was Coco and Firuze. I had acquaintances and contacts but no real friends outside of Iran. Then when a friendship was forming I had to leave.”

“You came into my life like a storm uprooting what I didn’t want to look at. Making me feel things I shouldn’t feel.” But she needed it like air. She didn’t notice how unhappy she had been until she started to feel something again. Kat was tall, beautiful, impulsive, frustratingly challenging, and straight. More than that she was generous, honest, protective, and loving. She saw her and accepted her. Kat never asked anything of her or expected anything. She never asked her to leave Coco and be with her. She never questioned why they spoke daily when she was in France and Coco never came up. She never asked for more than Adena was able to give. 

Adena only now sees there could have been other reasons why. 

Kat busily played at the handle and lettering of the mug. “I was the reason you broke up with her; that’s what it sounded and looked like despite what you said. I felt horrible. It’s one of the reasons I freaked out and broke it off before we really got started. I’ve never been in a relationship before and I definitely didn’t want to start one that way.” She studied Adena’s soft face and sad eyes. “And you didn’t seem too sure either.”

“You’re right, I wasn’t sure about us.” She began to pull nervously at her hands. “It was hard going back to Paris when I really wanted to be with you but you didn’t want to be with me, at least that’s what you said. You told me to go back to her and she was calling nonstop so I agreed to try.”

Kat remembered the feeling of heartbreak all too well when Adena told her she was going back to Paris. She did it to herself, that’s what she remembered thinking. 

“Coco tried. I guess we both did to a point but I couldn’t let you go so I finally ended it for good. I was falling in love with you.”

“Okay.” Kat took a deep breath, ducking her head once before gathering her composure. “I’m going to tell you something and I’m very much aware of how this makes me a shitty person. I didn’t think or care about Coco until after you broke up with her. I was never jealous of her because she was a nonfactor to me. I only cared about what I was feeling, what I wanted. You. I know, I’m horrible.”

“You’re not.” She was one of the most thoughtful people she knew.

“I didn’t know her but I knew something was happening between us. I could feel it and it felt stronger than anything I’ve ever felt.” That feeling has only grown stronger since.

“I felt it too.” Adena recalled pulling Kat into her mouth for their first electrifying kiss. All thoughts of Coco momentarily erased from her consciousness. All that existed in that moment was need and the feel of her soft lips on her own and the teasing taste of her tongue. Adena could no longer keep up the pretense of not wanting her when Kat's warm eyes and disarming words enraptured her. So she allowed herself to fall into her lips with reckless abandonment. Kissing her gently at first. She needed to know Kat wanted to be with her, a woman. Then Kat returned that kiss with a fiery passion unmatched. She allowed herself to get swept away by the passion and romance of it all when she invited her upstairs where they continued to explore each other on the couch. They made it to bed before Adena allowed the gravity of what she had done and what she was about to do meant. They were down to their underwear before they decided to slow it down.

“She reminds me of my worst self.” 

“And mines. That’s what this is about.” Coco was a reminder that she was capable of cheating. 

“I don’t like Coco contacting you and I don’t care if I sound jealous.” Kat’s eyebrows furrowed, “She’s still in love with you.”

Adena captured Kat’s free hand. “I don’t want to be with her. Only you, ātashé del-am. I love only you.”

“I love you.” Suddenly remembering why she came into the room, Kat lifted her occupied hand. “A peace offering.”

Adena took the warm mug.

Kat watched as her girlfriend palmed the large mug in between both hands and took a long slow sip savoring it. Her lips curled in distinct recognition of the exact spice combination that she could never quite nail. “Maman made this?”

“Yeah.” Kat was amazed at how Adena’s mood shifted so quickly by something so simple.

She took another sip before offering some to Kat. “Taste it. You have never tasted anything so good.”

She took the mug. Her smile was filled with skepticism, doubtful that a cup of tea could change her whole outlook on life. 

Adena watched as Kat took her first sip. She was tentative, testing the temperature of the liquid. Then she went in for a more satisfying sip. “Oh, that’s serious.”

Adena’s emotions began to settle, allowing her to really take in Kat for the first time tonight. She really was exhausted. Her eyes were heavy and she looked peakish. “When was the last time you ate?”

Kat glanced at the digital clock on the nightstand on her side of the bed. It read 10:42 pm. “I don’t know, I think one.”

“Let me heat you up something to eat.” Adena’s hand reached out and caressed Kat’s cheek.

“Babe I just want a shower and the bed.”

“You know you sleep better with something on your stomach. So take a shower and I’ll heat up something light for you.” Kat sighed and acquiesced. “Go on, so you can rest.”

Kat handed the virtually empty cup back to Adena and went to the dresser drawer to retrieve her respectable pair of pajamas. 

 

………

 

Mrs. El Amin heard the shower turn on and drew the logical conclusion. “Ada, did you let Kat try some of your chai?”

Her mother speaking in Persian was the sound of home. She smiled to herself and replied back in Persian. “Yes, but you could have made more. She drank most of the cup.”

“I’ll make more before I leave.” Her mother watched as she retrieved a few containers from the fridge. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah. I’m just heating up some soup. She hadn’t eaten since lunch. She has been overworking herself. I swear they have her doing everything. She’s the social media director but they have her organizing events and writing pieces for the magazine.” She placed a small pot on the stove and emptied the rest of the container to be heated.

“Yes, Ada but are the two of you Okay?” 

She waved away her mother’s concern and turned the stove’s burner on low. “Oh yeah, I know things were weird earlier but we talked. The last few weeks have been hard between both of our schedules. I guess part of me is still adjusting. I had her to myself uninterrupted when we were in Peru but her job seems to consume so much of her time lately and it’s frustrating.” She momentarily stopped her ministrations to look at her mother. “You know she was nervous to meet you.”

“I heard Coco’s name.” Mrs. El Amin studied her daughter as she resumed her actions of rinsing the containers then stirring the soup. “Why did her name come up?”

“She called.” Her mother gave her an imperceptible look but she knew she had an opinion. She was never demure but they have never talked about the details of her relationships.

“Are you and Coco consorting?”

“Maman, no... but her calling brought up things that needed to be said.”

“Are you happy?”

“Kat makes me so happy.”

………………

Mrs. El Amin was curled up on the couch with a couple issues of Scarlet, the issues that featured her daughter. Adena was making her way in the world, carving out her path. The mother was proud but she still worried. The older woman was brought out of her musings when a freshly showered Kat sat down at the wooden kitchen table. She politely declined to join the girls at the table when invited. She used the excuse of finishing up the essays but she really wanted to give them space. More than that she wanted to take a step back and see how they related to one another. She came to America to see her daughter and understand her better.

“You’re not going to eat?” Kat questioned.

“I ate,” Adena replied, urging her to have a seat.

Kat sat at the table in front of the bowl of lentil soup and bread that was warmed for her. Adena stood beside her, taking a moment to scratch her scalp since her hair was down. Kat wrapped an arm around Adena’s waist, leaning her head onto her stomach. Her eyes fluttered closed briefly “Thank you for this.” 

Adena bent down and kissed the crown of Kat’s curly head. She encouraged the woman to eat up before she took an adjacent seat at the table. 

Mrs. El Amin listened as Kat asked about Adena’s day. Adena asked about Kat’s team project and listened intently to her response. She paid attention as her daughter stayed in physical contact Kat whether playing with her fingers or touching her arm. She took in the way Kat smiled despite her clear exhaustion. 

Soon enough Kat finished up and took her dishes to the sink. 

“Leave it,” Adena said.

Kat said her goodnights and retired to bed.

Adena soon followed, after making sure her mother was fine with her leaving her to her own devices. It was late but Mrs. El Amin suspected her daughter wasn’t so much tired as wanting to be with Kat. Her daughter was a lesbian. It took her a long time to accept that and when she did it continued to be an abstract concept. She didn’t have to see it, and until Kat, Adena didn’t speak of her previous relationships beyond a passing acknowledgment. Now she’s in her daughter’s home that she shares with a non-muslim woman witnessing up close what it means for her daughter to be in a relationship. She was not comfortable actually far from it, but she loved her daughter more than her own need to be comfortable. The mother placed magazines on the table and reached underneath the lamp shade to turn it off. Regardless of sexual orientation, she just wished her daughter would marry before cohabitating.


	5. Boy or Girl?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat and Adena's mother spend more time together before an unexpected interruption.

Kat sat on a bench in Central Park with Adena’s mother, killing time before meeting with Adena. The Metropolitan Museum of Art was having an exhibition that Mrs. El Amin showed interest in seeing. Adena had a meeting she needed to attend but they planned to link up in Central Park across from the museum. 

Adena’s mother has been staying with them for over a week now. She and Kat had a rocky start but they finally had reached a level of comfort around each other. Kat was no longer hypervigilant and unusually quiet around the woman. Adena had noticed and called her out on it. She said she was being weird and told her to cut it out. So she did but she warned her, “If your mother hates me it’s your fault.” In response, Adena rolled her eyes, turned over, and went to sleep. In turn, Mrs. El Amin relaxed also. Kat discovered the woman was not shy and didn’t hold her tongue. She was funny but also unnerving at times. 

It was a chill in the air but a beautiful day. The sun was shining and there were plenty people in the park. 

“Do you know why I gave you only one cup of tea that first day?” Mrs. El Amin said breaking Kat out of her thoughts as they continued to people watch from the bench.

“You didn’t like me.” Kat deadpanned. 

She smiled tightly in the way Adena does at times and shifted her gaze to her daughter’s partner. “That was not the reason Kat. Adena used to be a...how do you say….stubborn, selfish child. Getting her to share anything when she did not want to was an impossible task. If she did not want to be moved, she would not be moved.….and my chai was always her favorite. She would only share if she really loved you.” 

Kat was confused as to where this was going but nonetheless listened. She wanted to know everything about the woman she was sharing her life with. 

“In spite of our first meeting, I knew Adena loved you by virtue of her opening up.” The mother’s gaze shifted out to the expanse of green grass and trees with leaves turning shades of orange, yellow, and brown. “Adena used to be so secretive about the goings on in her life. Looking back it made sense, given what she was feeling and our culture but she stayed secretive even after moving away. It hurt when she would call and there would be distance because of things not spoken.”

“She dated this Coco woman for three years and she barely mentioned her.” Mrs. El Amin adjusted her entire body to look the young women in her eyes. “You two have been together, what? a year? And I’m staying in your home and we’re talking. My daughter is talking to me about her relationship. My daughter talking to me at all is a gift because it wasn’t always so.”

 

Kat considered what Adena’s mother was telling her as she continued.

“After Ada was detained, that was the first time I heard of an American named Kat Edison. She wouldn’t talk about it. I think because she thought I would be too embarrassed but she mentioned you by name. You were the one that helped her get out of that situation. I wondered, who was this Kat Edison? How much power did this woman have to pressure our government to release my Ada? Who was this woman to my daughter? Why would she do this for her? But it didn’t matter why. I just thanked Allah.” 

Kat shivered when a burst of cold wind whipped through the park and their bodies. Mrs. El Amin reached into her purse and drew out a red scarf. She zipped up Kat’s black leather jacket as far as it would go with little protest. Then she folded the scarf in half before tying it securely around the young woman's neck. She was satisfied as her hands dropped back down to her lap. 

Kat felt like a kid. It was something her mother or aunt would do. If it was anyone else she would surely object but it was Adena’s mother and she was getting cold. 

“You were not what I was expecting,” the mother looked her over. She was young, African American, and shows entirely too much skin for her comfort. Mrs. El-Amin has spent the last 10 days observing the woman before her. Kat was also generous, a hard worker, and loved her daughter.

Kat watched the older, graceful woman regard her, not sure if it was a bad or good thing.

“The next time she spoke about you she called after we were cut off. I remember calling but she was out. I heard a nasty man and the phone went dead. My stomach was in my throat until I heard her voice again. She called to reassure me she was ok but Ada had a sound in her voice. She was in a panic and it soon became clear that she was crying. She told me about the man who attacked you two. The police. Her running. She didn’t know what to do. She was worried about you and she had your phone. She didn’t know who to call and what she would even say. She didn’t know where you were.”

Kat's stomach knotted up. All she could do was stuff her hands into her jacket and avert her eyes. The mother noted this. 

“I remember calling not too long after that and she was back in Paris. She said she was working on her relationship with Coco. I asked about her friend and if she was okay. She said yes but didn’t want to talk about it further.”

“I never asked what happened and I won't now. I like you Kat, I really do, but the two of you concern me.” She watched as Kat looked at her with questioning eyes. “You're moving so fast.”

“My parents said the same thing.” She was so stressed when they met Adena the first time.

“Good. Then maybe you two will actually listen. When you move too fast you miss the important steps.” Silence settled between the two women for a few beats. “You don’t like to talk about things that bother you, I noticed.”

Kat wouldn’t dare deny it. 

“If you are serious about my daughter and I think you are...If she needs to talk, talk to her. Because once she doesn’t want to, you will wish she did. This I know.”

Kat was about to reply when she heard someone call her name. “Kat, is that you?” The women looked up. She must have looked confused because he pointed to his chest. “It's me, Trevor. The Sports Agent.”

Kat remembered him. ‘Free Bird” guy. He wasn’t a bad guy but he could be obnoxious. She felt self-conscious knowing that her girlfriend’s mother was right next to her. “Hey.” She got up from the bench and walked over to him. He opened his arms for a hug. She hesitated briefly before giving a loose hug.

“How have you been?” He was delighted to see her if the smile was any indication.

“Good. Busy. Work, man but you know how that is.” She stuffed her hands into her pockets.

“Yeah, I do.” He was not subtle as he checked her out. She was as beautiful as he remembered. “So, not that it matters much now but what happened that night? We seemed to be hitting it off. Then you took off.”

Kat fell quiet for a moment, considering how much she wanted to say. She didn’t owe him anything. They went on one ‘okay’ tender date. The truth was if he knew how not to be a dick to buskers he would have gotten much further with her. She didn’t know how far given she really wasn’t ready to move on from Adena. “Trevor, I wasn’t ready to date at that time.”

 

………………………...

Adena left her meeting at the gallery as soon as she could. The train ride was not packed and the car only mildly smelled of urine. She walked with an urgency not wanting to leave her mother and Kat waiting too long. She was excited about this exhibition and was happy that her mother suggested they go. The exhibition, Modernism on the Ganges, was sure to inspire her. She had studied the Indian photographer’s work after being introduced to him a couple of years back. She entered the park and made her way down the path hoping to locate her mother and Kat.

Adena smiled when she caught sight of her love. The smile flattened when she noticed a handsome man invading her space. He was tall and brown skinned. She wasn't familiar with him. He was standing a little too close for her comfort. He was flirting, even at that distance, she could tell. He was smiling, his eyes were fixed on Kat, and he leaned into her at every opportunity. 

Adena continued to walk down the winding park path. Kat was smiling as she looked up at him; her body language was closed off. Her arms were folded and she would lean back as he teetered towards her. 

Off to the side, her mother stood from a bench and walked over to her girlfriend, joining the conversation with the man.

…………………

Mrs. El Amin is protective of her daughter and by extension that includes Kat and their relationship. “We should get going if we're to meet Ada.” 

Kat was happy with the interruption. “Trevor this is Mrs. El Amin, my” girlfriend’s mother she was about to finish with before getting cut off by the older woman. 

“Mother in law,” the older woman finished. 

Kat eyes went large and readjusted before Trevor looked at her with surprise. 

“I didn't realize.” 

She didn’t realize either, she wanted to say. Adena’s mother simply misspoke, that's what she wanted to tell herself. However, she spent enough time with the woman to know she speaks English very well. She wouldn’t panic but it was too cold for her to be feeling this hot around her around the collar. Kat registered that they both were staring at her, waiting for a response. 

“Oh, yeah. You remember me mentioning being with a woman, right?”

“Yeah.” 

Mrs. El Amin didn’t like the way he grinned at that statement.

“We got back together.” 

Trevor’s grin dissipated as he watched a beautiful woman mold into Kat’s side. 

Mrs. El Amin lips curled into a smirk.

…………..

 

Kat feels a hand slide around her waist causing her to turn and smile. Adena leans in and kisses her on the lips. “Hey, babe. This is Trevor. Trevor this is Adena.” She would have said my girlfriend but Lady El-Amin, House of No Chill, had to give the impression of being married. 

Trevor took in the petite hijab-wearing woman before him. Her rich red lipstick, gold hoop earrings, and piercing brown eyes. He shook the shock from his face and reached out to shake her hand. 

Adena shook his hand, uncertain still of who he was. However, his body language told her all she needed to know. Whoever he was, he was definitely attracted to her girlfriend. “Dilaam, we should go if we’re going to make the exhibition. Adena entwined her hand with Kat’s, feeling possessive.

Kat checked the time on her phone. “You're right.” She looked back to Trevor. “I have to get going but it was nice seeing you.”

“Yeah, you too.” He waved as she walked away flanked by Persian women.

“Who was that?” Adena inquired as they walked towards the museum.

Kat chuckled, “Boy or girl?”

“What?” confusion was written all over her face.

“Boy or girl?” She repeated.

Then it clicked and Adena remembered. “Ahhhhh, boy. Seems you have a type,” she teased

“Believe me, you’re nothing alike.” She raised their hands and kissed it.

“What did he want?”

“He wanted her.” Adena’s mother chimed in, not amused.

‘See, no chill’, Kat thought. 

……….

“You dated him?” Mrs. El Amin asked as they moved from photograph to photograph finding herself more interested in her daughter’s girlfriend than the exhibition.

“Dated is a bit too generous. We had one date.” Kat stopped to take in the vibrant colors that proliferated the photograph in front of them. She tilted her head try to take in the photographers perspective.

“So you’re not …” Mrs. El Amin whispered.

Adena knew her mother and where this was going and sighed. “Maman, she is not a lesbian. I’m the first woman she has dated.”

Mrs. El Amin brows knitted together, “So you’ve never been with a woman before Ada?”

“Nope.” A gentle tug of the hand by Adena signaled they were moving onto the next piece.

“Only men?”

“Yup.” Too bad that didn’t mean Adena’s mother would move on from her current topic.

“Why, no one asked you?”

Kat smiled wide despite herself. “I’ve been approached by women before but I wasn’t interested.”

“Tell me all about these women who approached you.” Adena narrowed her eyes in a playful manner leading Kat to quirk an eyebrow in return.

“Were you scared?” The mother wondered.

“No.”

“Maman, please stop interrogating Kat about her sexuality.” She knew Kat was being a good sport because it was her mother. 

Mrs. El Amin wanted to shush her daughter. “What interrogation? I’m only asking the girl questions.”

“It’s fine,” Kat replied with patience. “You can ask me whatever you like?” She resisted the urge to laugh when she caught the look Adena gave her as if to say don’t encourage her. “You may regret it.” It’s all she said instead.

“Wasn’t pretty enough?”

Kat did chuckle at that question. “I don’t t think that was the problem,” recalling the model that approached her after one of Scarlet's evening events. 

“Was it your parents?”

“No.” Her parents were not homophobic.

“Kat, you must tell me, then why Ada?” She was tired of a guessing.

Her heart made it simple but her head….that was another story. She didn’t know how to wrap her thoughts and feelings and present them with a neat bow. She didn’t know how to communicate how she felt about Adena to someone who wasn’t Adena. “It’s complicated.” She was not sure why Adena and not some other woman or man for that matter. She could only offer up hypotheses and guesses that feel true enough.

Adena was her binary, her balance. Stillness to her restlessness. Believer to her Agnostic. Luddite to her digital. Yet they were the same. Contradictory. Feminist. Challenging.

Adena was mysterious. Disarming. She made her want to be braver. She admired her. She never told her that but she does. She doesn't lose interest with her, only wants to know more. 

Adena mother’s question wasn't simple. It was wrapped up in questions about her sexual identity. She didn't know if she was bisexual, pan, or it was Adena specific. What she does know is that she loves her. It was easy and not easy. See, contradictory. Adena touched something in her. From the moment they met, they were locked into this dance that was destined to be cold or hot but never indifferent.

She had never seen someone so forceful and comfortable with vulnerability. It was attractive, dare she say sexy. Mrs. El Amin wants to know why her daughter and Kat doesn't think she can give a satisfactory answer. So she says, “She touched me here,” raising her free hand to her heart causing Adena’s eyes to mist. “... like no one else.”

It wasn't the answer Mrs. El Amin was looking for but it was compelling. 

Her daughter was loved and that's all she ever wanted for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the feedback.


	6. After Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat and Adena continue to reconnect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates from here on out will, for the most part, be shorter. Hope you guys enjoy. This was fun to write. NSFW!

Adena felt amorous. Now that she and Kat were back on track and her mother’s visit was going well she could relax. She slipped into bed without a shred of clothing, spooning a pajama-clad frame from the back. Kat hummed as she felt the weight of Adena’s arm encircle her waist. She loved being the small spoon.

Kat sighed in satisfaction and closed her eyes. It had been a long day. A good one but long. She was about to ease into a slumber before she felt her girlfriend’s slender fingers travel underneath her plain yellow tee shirt. Focused fingers stroked her abdomen before splaying upward and moving across her breasts. She felt her nipples react, hardening under the scrutiny of attention. Her breath hitched and she groaned when Adena applied the right amount of pressure to them. Then there was a hot mouth on her neck and a wet tongue dragging a trail to the sensitive spot behind her ear that made her whole body weak. It was all reflex when her hand reached behind her to pull Adena further into her neck.

It had been almost two excruciating weeks since they last had sex and it didn't take much for her body to react. Kat was becoming lost in the sensation until she remembered her lover’s mother in the next room. “What about your mother?” 

Adena slowed her ministrations which gave Kat a chance to turn around in her arms and face her. “She’s asleep,” she said not waiting before capturing Kat’s bottom lip between her teeth and sucking twice before releasing.

Kat’s hand reached for Adena’s waist underneath the covers to discover a hand full of bare skin triggering her to lift the covers and take in the sight of her girlfriend’s naked body underneath. That’s all it took to abandon her grip on the sheet. She lifted up and removed her sleeping shirt while Adena worked on relieving her of her pajama bottom and panties.

They faced each other as they laid side by side staring into each other’s eyes. Like two magnets destined to find their way to one another, their lips came together as it has countless times. Soft yet firm. The kiss was all consuming and moved like molasses.

Adena had waited all day for this moment. Today was the perfect day. Brunch. Great work meeting. Museum. Gelato. Street Performers. Dinner in Harlem. Now, home. To this. She felt whole in a way she hadn't in a long while. Maybe it was the looseness and fun of the day. Maybe it was the beautiful woman in her bed kissing her. Maybe it was her mother across the hall but her life felt integrated in a way it hadn't before. She didn't have to negotiate any of her identities and wasn't asked to compartmentalize any aspect of her life. She felt free. Watching her mother and girlfriend connect and bond in a meaningful way was helping to mend her heart. It was something she’d always desired but wouldn't dare allow herself to believe was possible. Her father had all but killed that belief but her mother found a way to breathe new life into it and for that she loved her even more. 

Adena pulled Kat closer to her body as their breasts connected. She hooked Kat’s knee with her hand and pulled it over her own hip. The younger woman was opened wide enough to allow Adena the access she required. A smooth hand twisted between their bodies, sliding along sensitive brown skin below her belly button into slick heat at the apex of her legs. Kat broke the kiss and gazed lovingly at the woman beside her. Fingers moved with ease and confidence along her warm, slick folds. She revelled in the feeling, never breaking eye contact with her lover.

Kat began to give herself over to Adena and the wildfire that was growing in her core. She bit down on her own lip to keep from moaning aloud. Her chest began to rise and fall in a more pronounced way as her breathing deepened. She clutched at Adena’s back with one hand attempting to anchor herself and simultaneously draw them closer. She tried to stifle the moans that threatened to spill from her lips as Adena’s dexterous hand continued to massage her center slow and intentional. 

The artist was mesmerized as her lover’s eyes became hooded with lust. She watched as Kat’s mouth slowly opened and remained suspended. Adena loved the way Kat would lick her lips when she purposely got dangerously close to the sensitive bundle of nerves only to pull back and then tease again.

The woman in her grasp was flushed with desire. Kat was always beautiful in Adena’s eyes but it was something about her tonight. Adena circled Kat’s entrance.

Kat steeled herself as Adena entered her with one finger first then as her body adjusted added a second. The pace was slow at first, painfully so, allowing the couple to build a strong rhythm. 

Adena began whispering sweet nothings in Persian. Kat knew some of the words but not all. It didn’t matter much what Adena was saying because it all sounded like love to Kat. 

“Kiss me” Adena whispered into her lips. Kat was eager to comply. Her mouth pressed into her lover’s again and again, concerned she was going to lose all decorum and wake the dead. She moaned into Adena’s mouth in between their lips and tongues colliding.

They remained interlocked in that position for some time. The artist’s deft fingers sinking further and further as her lover took her into her body. Their dark room filled with soft moans and heavy breathing. Adena thought Kat was hypnotic as they moved together. She couldn’t resist the “I love you” that bubbled up and out. Kat moaned louder, the only response she could muster.

Adena was caught in a whirl of curly hair as Kat rolled on top of her; but she never broke contact, keeping her fingers in place, buried firmly within her. She introduced the third finger with care and waited for Kat to adjust. Her free hand clamped down onto her girlfriend's hip as she watched the beautiful woman ride her hand. The beddings slipped from Kat’s back down around her ankles as she reared up like a Valkyrie on her horse. She was art and she was loud.

It reminded her of the very first time Kat let go when they made love. It was their first night in Peru together after she joined her. Unlike in the JFK airport, they had time and privacy to luxuriate in one another. Kat was expressive and in command. Adena found Kat’s comfort in her body and sexual expression irresistible. She had personally never experienced anything like it. Here in this moment, Kat was a goddess. The lamp post from the street cast light through the bedroom window and gave Kat’s skin a radiant glow. 

Adena was mesmerized by the rise and fall of perfect breasts. Her free hand moved from her lover's hip and cascaded up her ribs to cup one. 

Kat responded to her lover's caress with a moan. Her left hand covered Adena’s hand that was massaging her breast and the right slid up the sides of her own face into her curly locs. Her orgasm was building and every inch of her skin was set aflame by Adena.

The artist could feel it as the woman on top of her continued to ride with increasing abandonment. The smooth muscles of her girlfriend’s vaginal walls grew tighter around her fingers. Big brown eyes rolled behind her head. Her stomach glistening from Kat’s pooling arousal. All the signs signaled her girlfriend’s body was readying itself for an impending release. Adena gave Kat’s breast one last caress before placing that now free hand onto the small bundle of nerves lying in wait. 

Kat released a sound akin to whimper when she felt Adena’s thumb press into her clit and move in circles. Adena sped up her hand movements as a litany of guttural moans escaped from Kat. The younger woman loved the way the artist played her body like an instrument. 

Adena hoped her mother remained asleep through all this by some miracle because nothing short of death would make her stop now. 

There was a steady sound of soft tapping emanating from the room, mixing with moans as the headboard hit the wall. 

Kat’s hand reached behind her and slid into Adena’s wet patch and began to massage. “Come with me” she panted wanting to make the woman beneath her feel as good as she was feeling. She watched Adena chew on her bottom lip and moan whenever her fingers ran over the sensitive knot of nerves. Adena’s moans fueled her own, heightening her arousal. She wanted to ride out this feeling as long as she could. 

A cacophony of moans reverberated through the apartment but Kat could only register the delicious fire that licked at her core and moved across her body. Kat’s dark eyes met Adena’s once more and the only thought she had was of how much she loved the woman beneath her. How she wanted to spend the rest of her life with her and It all became too much. Her heart was overwhelmed and she couldn't stop the flood of emotions that welled up in her chest. Tears rolled down her face unapologetically as she cooed “I love you,” in Persian, one of a handful of phrases she knows. Those were the last words Kat uttered before Adena convulsed and they came simultaneously; bodies going rigid and then slowly riding out the tail-end of their orgasms together.

Kat collapsed onto Adena; both sweaty and limp. Holy shit, Kat thought.

Adena left her hand in place for awhile before removing it with care. 

Kat groaned at the removal, pretty sure she was going to feel that tomorrow.

Goosebumps began to form as her skin acclimated to the temperature of the room again. She felt chilled and reached for the long-abandoned beddings to cover their bodies. Adena wiped the sweat from her forehead as Kat settled into her side pulling the covers tight around them. She studied the woman in her arms, raising a hand to wipe away wetness left behind by her tears. That was new. Kat had never cried during sex before. Adena considered her and wondered if she could be her ‘forever.’ Perfect moments like these felt like it was all but assured. Her hand gently raised Kat’s chin and kissed her. 

The kiss broke leaving Kat silently peering up at Adena. There was something different about this kiss but she didn’t have the desire to overthink it. The only thing she was prepared to do was hold Adena in her arms all night as they both sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And for my comment warriors thank you for the love. It really does help to go back to the story especially when life gets in the way.


	7. Roots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adena and her mother have a heart to heart.

Adena was exhausted but she wasn’t going to miss her morning salat especially while her mother was visiting. She looked over at Kat strewn about the bed, asleep on her stomach. She didn’t have a stitch of clothing on and had kicked down most of the covers off of her body save a corner of the sheet that covered her ass. The woman flashbacked to last nights activities and smiled. She resisted the urge to plant kisses along Kat’s bare back in favor of a shower. Rolling out of bed, she grabbed a robe from the closet and headed for the shower. She adjusted the temperature of the cascading water to make it as hot as she could stand it. She grabbed the loofah and body wash and commenced to washing all signs of Kat and their love-making session from her body. 

Her mother was awake, waiting for her in the living room when she emerged from the bedroom after getting dressed. Kat remained knocked out through it all.

Adena started the coffee so it would be ready to pour from the French press after their morning prayers. 

After prayers, they put away their rugs and sat at the kitchen table to enjoy their cups of coffee.

Coffee usually inspired conversation with her mother, so Adena found her silence unusual. She watched as her mother sipped from her cup and focused on nothing in particular. The longer it went on the more self-conscious it made Adena. “Maman?,” getting her attention. “Is everything okay?”

“That’s a question I should be asking you. I came here to see my only daughter and learn more about her life.” She reached out to caress her daughter’s cheek. “I’ve missed you.” Adena smiled into her palm as Mrs. El Amin stared into her daughter’s eyes and saw her own, her mother’s, her grandmother’s. She lowered her hand and her head, smiling to herself before raising her eyes once more. “What I did not expect to learn was how you and your girlfriend sounded while being intimate. Kat’s a loud one isn’t she?”

“Maman!” The artist was mortified.

“Don’t, ‘Maman me’. If you are grown enough to have sex while your mother is the next room, you are grown enough to listen to me speak about it.” The mother pinched the bridge of her nose and yawned. “I could use more sleep.”

All Adena could do was sink down into her chair with cup in hand and apologize “Sorry.” 

“Somehow I doubt that.” She looked her daughter up and down. “The next time you have the urge, resist. Your mother has sensitive ears.”

Adena agreed. Afterall, it was only two more days. Of course, they could resist. They weren’t animals.

Mrs. El Amin studied her daughter and considered the woman sleeping in the other room. “Are you thinking about marrying her?”

Her eyebrows knitted in confusion as she sat up straight, “Why would you ask me that?” 

“Because I know you.” Her daughter has dreamed of a huge Persian wedding since she was nine and participated in her aunt Fatima’s wedding. Yes, children grow up and outgrow dreams but some truths always remain. Adena is lead by her heartstrings. It was true then and it remains true now. “And I see you with her.” 

Adena looked into her coffee mug for no other reason than to avoid her mother’s gaze. “You tell us we’re moving too fast but then asks about marriage. How does that work?” She exhaled before looking up. “Yeah, I think about it. I think about many things with her but I know it’s too soon.”

“Have you talked about it?”

Her mother pinned her with her eyes. “No, we haven’t talked about it.” She imagined bringing up marriage to Kat and watching her disintegrate into the ether out of sheer terror. She found, with some things, it was better to treat Kat like a ...well, cat. She could slowly introduce things but ultimately she let girlfriend come to her. Kat needs to process in her own way, otherwise she gets skittish and run. She knows that, although she sometimes forgets.

“Are you planning to put down roots in New York?”

“Yes.” She meant it when she told Kat she was ready to build a permanent home. She was tired of moving from country to country every 6 months to a year. 

Mrs. El Amin drank more of her coffee, taking her time before asking, “Is it because of Kat or because you really want to build a home here?”

Adena ran her hand through her hair, pulling it the right side. “Can’t both things be true?”

The older woman leaned in, “Can you see yourself living here without Kat?”

The question threw Adena and her mother registered the change. 

“If you cannot answer yes, I caution you to think about what you want, separate from Kat. You shouldn’t build your life around someone who has made no commitment to be there.”

Adena’s eyes narrowed, “We’re in a committed relationship.” 

“Whatever you call it, it’s not marriage.” The mother reclined back into her chair.

“Are you implying my relationship isn’t real?”

The mother could hear the defensiveness in her voice. “Of course not Ada, but dating is not marriage. Playing house is not the same as being rooted to someone. One person cannot leave because they are having a bad day. You don’t always get your way. You learn that sometimes your mate needs time and it’s better to give it to them then push because you are impatient. You both have so much to learn about relationships.”

“You say that but then you’re talking about marriage.” She forgot how crazy her mother can make her feel.

“I’m saying talk about the important things. Not just when there is a problem. Talk about what you two want. Does she want marriage? Kids? What if you have to move? Is she willing to move with you?” She held out her hand and waited for her daughter to take it. “I’m not attacking your relationship. Only the opposite. I want your relationship to succeed. I want you to be happy.” She gave a squeeze of the hand and released. 

“Kat is career-focused, we both are. We’ve only been dating a year so I highly doubt she’s thought about marriage.”

“I was engaged to your father after a year.”

“Are you telling me to propose?”

“I’m not telling you anything of the kind. I am saying, relationships fall apart when you don’t talk about the things that matter. This is why families get together to talk, to ensure compatibility. You’re young and romantic but romance is not love. And love is not the cure-all. It’s the fuel that gives you the strength and perspective to do the work. Relationships don’t thrive because you’re in love, they thrive because you put in the work. Your father and I made it this far because we learned to do the work.” 

There was a vulnerability laced into her voice as she asked, “Do you think Kat and I have what it takes to last?” 

“You two have growing to do.” She liked Kat. Everything Mrs. El Amin has seen and heard showed her Kat’s a fighter. She doesn’t easily give up. Whether Ada knew it or not she would need someone capable of fighting for her and beside her. She would need it being a Persian Muslim in the West. “But if you two did the work, I wouldn’t bet against you.” It was only a saying but she meant it. “She would be a fine daughter-in-law.” 

Adena afforded herself a smile that betrayed her longing desire to hear that sentiment. However, that wave of warmth disappeared as her mother continued.

“I spoke to your father this morning. You should call him.”

“Why?” She frowned. “So he can ignore me.”

“Ada, he loves you.”

She honestly didn’t know anymore. Maybe that was true, but trying to shame someone into submission was not love. “He is ashamed of me.”

“He misses you. He may not say it but it is there; In what he says and what he doesn’t.”

She shook her head, “I don’t know what you want from me.”

“To try. Don’t stop trying.”

Adena didn't think she had it in her. She wondered if her mother would ask her that if she understood how much it hurt. She sighed, “Maman, with all due respect, I am not the problem here.” She stood and made her way back to the bedroom. She heard her mother grumble, “You both are so stubborn,” in Persian as she walked away. 

…………………...

Kat watched her girlfriend close their bedroom door behind her and enter the room with a pensive look. Adena’s demeanor shifted when she noticed Kat alertness and a smile appeared. The naked woman rolled over on her side and patted the bed, “C’mere.” Adena crawled into bed, lying down in front of her love. Kat spooned her from behind, holding her securely in her arms. She nuzzled into the crook of her neck, “Love, what's wrong?”

“Maman wants me to call baba.”

Kat knew the troubled history between Adena and her father. There is always a sadness in her eyes when he comes up. Shortly after, that feeling is supplanted by anger. Kat knew the only reason she was angry was because it’s easier than being sad.

“What do you think?” Adena pulled her girlfriend’s arm tighter around her body, placing Kat’s palm flat against her heart. Kat realized she did that often when she was worried or overthinking.

 

“He’s your father, I can’t tell you what to do.” She didn’t know what it was like to not be supported by her parents. She complained about her parents but the truth is they have always been her biggest supporters. “You should do what feels right for you. If you don’t want to, I support you. And if you do, I support you.” Kat tucked wisps of Adena’s dark strands behind her ear and gazed at her before kissing her temple. She held her girlfriend close and breathed her. “I don’t like that he makes you cry.”

They stayed there, together in the silence, for several minutes until Adena changed the subject.

Adena rolled onto her back triggering Kat to prop up herself up on her elbow. “Maman heard us having sex. She said you were loud.” 

“You should have told her that was me holding back.” 

Riotous laughter erupted from both women.


	8. Sex, Love, Laughter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sex gossip and a little teasing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm cleaning out some old documents I came across this. I don't know why I never posted it. I must have forgotten about it in between my long hiatuses. I cleaned it up and decided to toss it out there.

“Why are you walking slow?” Jane asked as the trio headed for the elevator.

Kat began to get wet thinking about last night. She wondered if it would always be this way. Someone brings up that night and aftershocks roll through her body in remembrance of the time Adena owned her ass. Kat squeezed her thighs tight together feeling throbbing in her center at the very thought.

“Adena.” 

“I think I’m done, you guys.”

“What’s that?” Jane was confused.

“Adena can never leave me and I’m never breaking up with her. I officially had the best sex of my life last night.”

Sutton angled her head and smirked. “That good?” 

“She was so good last night, I could orgasm just by thinking about it.”

“TMI, Kat.” Jane grinned as they stepped onto the elevator and Jane pressed Scarlet’s floor. “Isn’t Adena’s mother still visiting?”

“And now she knows how good Adena is too.” Sutton quirked an eyebrow. “Don’t look at me like that, it had been 13 days.”

“Oh, the horror.”

“You laugh but it’s my stress reliever. Not all of us can be runners Jane.” Kat laughed and Jane rolled her eyes..

“Give me a number”, Sutton demanded.

“A number?”, Jane questioned.

“Yeah,” Sutton smiled. “Kat and I keep track of our top 5 orgasms.

“You do what now? And why am I only now finding this out?” 

“No offense babe but you’re kinda uptight at times.” Kat could see Jane processing that information. “And you’ve only had sex with two people since you’ve started having orgasms.” 

“Yeah, I’ mean it’s cruel to eat in front of starving man. So when you think about Kat and I were doing you a favor.” 

The elevator dinged and opened. Jane looked at both women, “I can’t stand you both.” She walked off the elevator leaving the twosome to follow her.

“Number, Kat.” Sutton waited expectantly as they walked down the hall.

“Number 1 and number 2.” Kat stated with great pride. She wasn’t ready to open up about the tears. She didn’t know what to make of it. Something like that has never happened.

“No shit.Oh, Okay Adena.”

 

……………………………………………………………………………………………  
Dinner at Kadena’s

 

A tipsy Sutton placed her elbow on the dining table and took a sip of her wine, leaning in to Kat. “Any anniversary sex?” It was loud enough for most to hear.

Kat turned slightly, “Her mother is right there, right there.” Kat waved her hand over to Mrs. El Amin for emphasis

“It is alright. After last night I am painfully aware of your healthy sex life.”

Jane started to snicker across the table.

“So loud,” Mrs. El Amin wore a distressed facial expression. 

That’s when Sutton, Pinstripe, and Alex broke. Laughter abound and Kat cut her eyes at her betrayers.

Adena wore a demure smile and rubbed Kat’s leg underneath the table for support.

Kat felt compelled to apologize, “I’m sorry.” ‘not sorry’ she said in her head. Number one!

“Don’t be sorry, be quieter.” Mrs. El Amin thinned her lips before a warm smile revealed itself.

“Can’t make that promise.” Kat glances around the table to everyone’s amused responses. “Oh my bad, did I say that out loud?” Kat grinned.

“It went on for so long.”

“Okay Maman, we get it.” 

Kat knew Adena’s mother was fucking with her for the sake of it now. “13 days, it had been 13 days.” Kat seemed to be pleaded to her table of friends as though they were a jury. None of them seemed to particularly on her side outside of Adena. “You don’t know my life.”

“We do, though.” Jane picked up her fork, grinned, and took a bite her cheesecake.

“Then finally I thought, it’s done, Good I can sleep again. No, It gets louder. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a hole in the wall.”

“Maman!” Now Adena was blushing beyond recognition.

Sutton donned a loopy grin and pointed towards the elder woman at the table. “I love her.”

“I will not be shamed for great sex. Orgasms are a right, not a privilege.” Kat was done.

Adena laned over and whispered into Kat’s ear, “Great, huh?” Kat gave turned and gave Adena a quick peck on the lips, ignoring her ego boosted statement.

Jane gave a cheesy toast to Kat and Adena for their one year anniversary.

You guys it’s only been a year.

“Yeah but in Kat years that’s like five. See what I did there?”

“Somebody cut her off.” 

 

Adena didn’t know Ryan very well despite being in each other’s orbits. “So you write about sex?”

Ryan sat his bear down. “Yeah, but it’s not exactly what it sounds like.”

Jane cut him off, “No it’s exactly what it sounds like.”

 

“I have never talked about so much sex in my life.” Mrs’ El Amin commented before looking over to Kat and teasing. “Kat so when are you two getting married?”

Sutton and Adena read Kat’s body language first. She stiffened like a deer in headlights. Sutton jumped in to help her friend out. “Seriously. Who would’ve thought Kat would have been the first to shack up with somebody?”

“Nobody could have seen this coming.” Jane took a sip of her wine.

Sutton took in Kat and Adena holding her arm next to her. “She was always so in control with those dudes. She had all the power and with you…”

“You confused her.” Jane finished. “It was the first time I saw her so unsure of herself. She was always so confident and with you all that was gone.”

Her friends were getting mushy and everyone was watching her and it was making her uncomfortable. Kat turned to Alex. “Anyway...How about that game?” 

“Oh, which one?” Alex asked seriously loving all sports talk.

Kat blinked. “Man, I don't know just help me out.” 

Sutton rubbed Alex's back. “Sweetie, this is why no one invites you into the fashion closet.”

…………………..


	9. Mother-in-Law?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mrs. El Amin's visit comes to a close.

Kat had finished reporting Scarlet’s numbers for featured articles in the most recent issue when the front desk receptionist interrupted her and Jacqueline. “Kat.” The young director twisted in her seat. “Your mother-in-law is here to see you.”

Jacqueline’s eyebrow raised and the social media director caught it.

“It’s not what it sounds like.” Kat began to stand as she questioned the woman. “She can’t be here by herself. Did you see Adena?” At this point, most staff knew Adena and the fact they were dating. The receptionist didn’t have a response. Kat excused herself and headed out of the door before running into her girlfriend. Adena was cheerful but Kat, less so. “We have to talk about your mother.”

She knew her mother couldn’t have done much in the entire four minutes left alone. “What did she do now?” Adena interlocked her fingers and lips thinned. 

“Why is she so obsessed with…” Kat trailed off after scanning her girlfriend’s new t-shirt. Her eyes widened, head angled, and arms flew up in the air in exaggeration. “Babe come on.” Adena wore a tweed blazer, a blue hijab, and a white shirt that read MY GIRLFRIEND IS A PROUD HETERO in bold black letters. “You’re going to wear this in your meeting with Jacqueline? Who is my boss?”

“It’s funny, no?” she purred with a French accent.

The director new Adena better than she thought. “I know what you’re doing.” Her French accent thickened when she was going out of her way to be cute or sexy. “This is payback for my BANG IT LIKE A # shirt isn’t it?”

“You’re cute.” The artist cupped her left cheek. “Please keep my mother out of trouble while I take this meeting, Mon Coeur.” A kiss on the right cheek, a gentle swipe of her thumb to remove lingering lipstick, and she was gone.

Kat rolled her eyes and grumbled before turning on her heel to find her ‘mother-in-law’.

Jacqueline smirked and invited the artist into her office to have a seat. She’s tried to get Adena into her office for a meeting for a couple of months now.

……………..

The receptionist was asking Mrs. El Amin about her lipstick brand. The richness of the red undertones was beautiful. The women were sharing a laugh when the receptionist spotted Kat first. “Why didn’t you tell me? I totally would have gotten you a wedding present.”

The unamused woman tightly smiled, “Mother dearest, a word please.” Mrs. El Amin crossed the space between her and Kat. 

“Why didn’t you tell me you get free makeup samples?”

“You’re killing me, you know that? Why do you insist on telling anybody who will listen Adena and I are married?” Kat’s voice was only a little whiny and she didn’t cause a scene. All in all, a win in her book. “I don’t want to give anybody the wrong impression, is all.” There was a plea for understanding in her tone.

Perfectly threaded eyebrows furrowed. “What impression would that be?” The older woman weight shifted to the back of one of her feet as she crossed her arms. “The one where you are in a long-term committed relationship with my daughter.”

“Why do you hate me?” The woman pouted but was promptly ignored by Mrs. El Amin. 

Instead, Adena’s mother hooked her by the arm. “So are you going to stand there and frown all day or are you going to show me around?”

“Trill,” Kat huffed and led the way down the hall to introduce Adena’s mother to her team. Things went well at first, then got awkward when she asked Kat if she had the power to fire them all. One yes response and three awkward reassurances later that no one was being fired had her ready to move on. She continued with the tour and stopped to talk with a few of the writers such as Alex. Mrs. El Amin was dying to know how he came to write for a women’s magazine but was interrupted when he got a call from Jane. They finished with Sutton’s and Oliver’s workstation last. Mrs. El Amin was a little too interested to learn Sutton was one of Kat’s best friends. She quickly shuffled the woman out of the office in the name of not getting Sutton yelled at by Oliver.

Kat rounded off the tour with an ending in the fashion closet. It was there Kat was able to put aside a few lipsticks and eyeliners that her self-appointed mother-in-law could take back home with her.

“Your editor-in-chief is offering Ada a job?” The woman moved along the wall to inspect the varying articles of clothing and accessories.

“Opportunity for contract work?” Kat found a cute bag for the samples and dropped the makeup inside before drawing the string close.

“Did you set this up?” Mrs. El Amin came to a rack of dresses, stopped, and turned to Kat. 

“I don’t get in the middle of Adena’s work. Jacqueline knows how talented she is and Scarlet would be lucky to have her in any capacity.” 

“You are the reason Ada associates with this magazine at all,” Mrs. El Amin reminded.

Kat handed over the small pouch and the mother thanked her. “Scarlet isn’t what she thought it was. I helped her see the magazine in a different light”.

Maybe, the mother thought but it was more like she saw Kat in a different light. The woman glanced at the huge clock on the wall. She had a few precious hours left with her daughter before she had to be at the airport. “I don’t like the thought of leaving her here which is ridiculous, because she has lived on her own, abroad for so many years.” Lines of worry formed across the mother's flawless skin as she examined a navy evening gown before returning it to the rack. “There are oceans and continents between us more times than not but I cannot stand the thought of her being alone in the world.”

“She’s not,” slipped from Kat’s lips, talking more to herself than to woman next to her. 

Mrs. El Amin’s face softened and a warm smile appeared. 

Suddenly feeling uncomfortable, Kat cleared her throat and said, “We should go.”

…………….

Jacqueline opened her office door. “Let me know when you two are free and we’ll have dinner at my place. My husband is a great cook. ”

Adena promised and left the office in search of Kat and her mother, who she found near Kat’s office.

Kat saw Adena and grabbed her jacket and scarf to leave. “How did the meeting go?” She threw on her leather jacket and knitted scarf as they walked to the elevators. 

“It was productive. Nothing is finalized but if everything comes together I will do a couple of shoots for the magazine.” The artist pressed the button and they waited. 

Mrs. El Amin asked, “Kat do we have time to get some of those cookies before going to the airport? You know the kind with the daneye maghzdar.” They all stepped into the elevator.

“Yeah”, the social media director responded as Sutton looked on.

“Wrap up it’s cold out.” Mrs. El Amin fussed which animated Adena. Both women began to adjust Kat’s scarf and secure her jacket.

Sutton laughed, “Oh my God, you’re so married.”

Kat gave up and her face held no expression as the elevator doors closed.

…………………

Adena was more quiet than usual as they watched the plane take off. Her mother planned to call before boarding her connecting flight in France which wouldn’t be for another 8 hours. She turned to Kat. “You ready?”

Kat took Adena’s hand as they walked away from the glass window. “What do you think she would say if she knew we banged for the first time over in that lounge?”

“My girlfriend, the romantic.” The sarcasm was evident but so was the love. “Come on, let’s go home.”

“Home sounds good.”

…………

The pajama-clad couple cuddled up on the couch after Kat lit a cluster of candles on the coffee table and found that Brazilian radio station on her laptop they loved that played nothing but bossa nova. It was weird that a Brazilian station reminded her of Peru. She discovered the station while there with Adena. The station was the soundtrack to their Peruvian adventures. For instance, the song O Pato was a ridiculously cute song about a duck. But now she will forever associate that song with Adena in the kitchen dancing with hips swaying as she fixed lunch. 

Kat was the picture of calm with Adena in her arms and a blanket tossed over their legs. The sun had gone down, lights were off, all except the light from the candles. She could feel her girlfriend thinking. “You miss her already don’t you?”

“I know she drove you crazy,...” Her girlfriend's “Nooo,” response was exaggerated and unconvincing. “... but it was nice, her being here.”

“It was, except for the part where we couldn't have sex.”

“Why is it always about sex with you?”

“That's not true. Sometimes it's about food and sleep.” She grinned into her partner's hair when she felt the playful tap of Adena’s hand on her thigh. 

Adena was grateful for the burgeoning relationship between her mother and partner.   
“You were good with her.” 

“She was cool,” mostly. “I like her.”

“I miss home.” It sounded like a heavy confession as she absentmindedly played with the younger woman's fingertips.

Kat knew what Adena meant, she thinks. But it doesn’t keep her from feeling hurt. She wanted Adena to see their home as home. To see her as her home. Because that’s what she was to her. Increasingly more so with each passing day. Jane would tell her she was being overly sensitive and she’d probably be right. Her girlfriend was missing her mother and the rest of her family. That’s not a good reason to freak out and make it about their relationship. So she held on tighter and whispered into her ear. “When things settle down, you’ll go back to visit. I’ll go with you.” The woman expected protest but was pleasantly surprised when none came, only a soft “okay.” 

Aganju by Bebel Gilberto began to play and Kat hummed along before singing the chorus. “Doesn’t this remind you of that night in Peru?” Kat’s voice sounded low and soft like velvet to Adena. 

“Which one?” she asked trying to recall the specific night. Kat spent six weeks with her in Peru and all of them were great nights if you asked her.

“It was my second week there and we had that storm that wiped out all the electricity on the block for a day. We must’ve burned a dozen candles and made love until daybreak.”

It was eerily quiet that night after the storm passed. No ambient noise of bugs or stray animals, no traffic, no joyous ruckus that went on a little too long. It was a stillness to the night that was rare. Adena remembered the slow burn of those hand-made candles. The way the flame’s shadows danced and flickered at the walls and across Kat’s face. Then her breasts as she undressed her. Her bare back. Their bodies molding into one another’s. They couldn’t get enough of one another. She wanted to consume her, all of her. Despite the time already spent and the promise from Kat to stay longer, each moment felt precious, like it could be their last and she treated it as such. “That was a memorable night.” Adena remembered the delicious warmth of candle wax that her lover carefully dripped onto her breasts, allowing it to cool and harden before fingering the wax and removing it. The artist brought Kat’s right hand to her lips and kissed it. Then she isolated her lover’s middle and pointer finger, taking it into her mouth to the base of her knuckles before pulling out and guiding them underneath the blanket and her panties into pooling heat. “And morning,” she moaned.


	10. Recollection - 2 (Peru)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drabbles of time spent in Peru

July 17th 9:48 am in Peru, 8:48 am New York’s time she sent a text to Kat about hiking. Kat was on her mind even more so than before since their last meeting. She wanted to hold her and just be near her but in the moment she had to settle for a text. 

She was intrigued when Kat returned a text about doing something crazy. Adena was taken aback when a few hours later Kat sent a pic of her plane ticket showing date of departure and destination with an accompanying text that read Is this okay? She was hot, sweaty, and lethargic but reading that message managed to re-energize her. More than okay. She typed fast and hit send.

July 18th 3:22 pm Kat was here, in Peru, in her home with her mouth making its way up the left side of her neck, making it hard for her to think. “We should get you settled before,” she managed to say before trailing off when Kat’s lips pressed into hers. The artist’s deft fingers blindly went to work on Kat’s pants. 

It was 9:01 pm when they came for the last time that night, but it was the first time they came at the same time. As Kat dozed off to sleep, she wondered if this was typical for Kat. Sex with her was athletic and passionate. She had never had sex for so long. She had never came so many times, at one point she wondered if Kat was trying to kill her. She reached out and brushed away stray curls covering her face. She ran a thumb over her cheek in disbelief. She was here. With her. Brown eyes fluttered open to Adena’s uncontained smile. ‘Hey there,” Kat whispered.

 

July 22nd Kat always thought she hated talking but that was becoming less true when it came to Adena. They talked about everything and nothing. And when they didn't talk, the silence was charged with sexual tension and underlying comfort. It was like nothing she had experienced before. 

8:11 pm Kat knows in this moment she made the right decision to follow her heart. She was happy in a way she hadn't been the last month. In New York, she was down. Everything and everyone demanded something of her all at once. She was doing the work of two people if not three. Jane was pressuring her about the layoffs. Her apartment was infested. And Adena well, she was on the other side of the world pretending something wasn't happening between them. Nothing was right. That was until Adena left Paris for New York. 

 

July 26th Adena learns Kat can cook. Their time in Peru can be marked by meals, music, and sex. Adena was content to eat at the apartment most of the time which meant she was cooking. If they ate out Kat was paying usually. So she was skeptical when Kat decided she was cooking their dinner tonight. Kat took a trip to the local market and purchased all of the necessary ingredients. 

“You know how to make pasta? From scratch?”

“Don’t sound so surprised. This sauce is going to be another 5 minutes. Here,” she spooned up some sauce and blew on it. “It’s not too spicy is it?” All of Adena’s skepticism left her body when she tasted the sauce.

“Perfect,” she purred. 

Adena took out one bottle of wine in the apartment. It was a barter for a photograph. The trade was worthless to her because she didn't drink. But the way Kat's eyes lit up, reassuring her it was a $50 to $60 bottle of wine. So she took the trade and gave it to Kat as a gift. 8:11 pm Adena learns that two glasses of red wine makes Kat horny. Turned out the trade wasn’t worthless after all.

 

July 30th 7:12 am The artist straddled Kat on the bed, knees hugging the sides of her lover's thighs. Both women down to their panties and tank tops. Kat’s hand traveled instinctively to her inner thigh and began to massage. 

“Kat what are we doing?” Adena felt fingers move higher and brush against her center causing her to bite her bottom lip. “Besides that.” Adena was happy she was there but they didn’t talk about ‘them’ and the labeling of what was happening between them. What were they? “Why are you here?”

“Have I overstayed my welcome?” The director second guesses herself and begins to pull away. 

Adena stops her. “If you knew how I felt, you wouldn’t ask such questions.” 

The intensity in which Adena said that moved something in Kat.

“What made you come?”

“I wanted an adventure with you.” She told Jane and Sutton she was going for the adventure, the feeling, the enlightenment. When Adena was all the reason she needed. Adena was her adventure. “I missed you.”

The artist bent down and whispered “I missed you too” into Kat’s full lips before closing the distance and pressing into them with her own. Kat’s arms wind around her back and pull her into her body. Her lips part granting access to Adena’s tongue as the kiss deepens. 

 

August 3rd 

Kat woke early this morning, at least early for her since being in Peru. She'd spent most of that time gazing at Adena’s profile taking in the naked woman she was occupying a bed with. 

Kat doesn't mean to but she blurts out “What do you want us to be?” as soon as Adena opens her eyes. 

Adena blinked and took in Kat. It was clear that this had been something on her mind. “Tell me what you want.”

“Nothing has changed. I meant it when I said it. I'm in this with you. I want to be with you if you want to be with me. Do you still want to be with me?” 

There was nothing to think about. “Yeah, I do.”

“You know I've never been in a relationship before. I don't know if I'm any good at it.” 

“Just keep doing what you’re doing.”

7:34 am when they officially entered into a relationship. 

 

August 5th Adena realized they needed structure. She found her days and nights consumed with Kat mentally and physically. She wasn't working or accomplishing anything. Neither of them were. Kat was in her system like a drug and it was hard to pull away. 

“Kat Edison you are full of surprises.” 

“We’re back to full name basis, are we?”

“For someone who has never been with a woman before, you're a wonder.” 

“Well you know I was a gifted child.”

The way Kat's eyes roamed over her body did something to her. She felt the tension building in her with visions of Kat between her legs devouring her.

“We should do some work.” The artist gathered a sheet around her body to exit the bed but was slowed when Kat's hand caught her wrist. 

“I want this, you know. You, me, together. I want us. But it's hard to ignore the part of me that wonders, What if it doesn’t work out?” She had never had her heart broken. She also had never wanted anyone as much and that scared her.

“But What if it does?”

Kat got lost in Adena’s eyes and chose to believe.

 

August 5th 1:07 pm. It was hot and humid day and the air conditioner was on the fritz. If there was a breeze somewhere it was being held hostage by the sky because nothing would move, including Kat. It was too hot. Kat fell asleep with her head in Adena’s lap. 2:12 pm. Kat woke up to the left side of her head braided into cornrows. 2:21 pm They had their first discussion about her hair. 

 

August 18th Kat was leaving today. She was astutely aware of this fact as she watched Adena sleep. The last six weeks had been a dream. A long beautiful, sex-filled dream. 

She took in every eyelash, every line, curve, and freckle. She wanted to remember it all. The feel of Adena on top of her, beneath her, beside her, inside her, or simply half draped on top of her like now. The taste and smell of her. She wanted to remember the curl of her lips smiling the widest, unbridled grin. The sound of her laughter. The sound of her ecstasy. The sound of Adena breathlessly saying her name.

“You okay?” Adena croaked, her voice dry from the night before. Her eyes slowly adjusting to the light and the lovely face in her view. 

Kat draped a hand over her girlfriend's waist and snuggled into her side. She wasn't ready to leave Adena and the blissful space they've carved out together in Peru. “Yeah.”

8.21am Kat smiled thinking for the first time, this must be what love feels like.

……………...

It was a few minutes after noon and her taxi would be there shortly. They agreed Adena would stay and she would go to the airport alone. She was tired of having to say goodbye to her. Kat couldn’t bear the thought of having to say goodbye at another airport terminal. 

They stood together in the studio apartment that had been a respite from the rest of the world, aware that in a few minutes they would have to separate. They didn’t know when or how they would meet again, only promising they will regardless of the circumstances.

Kat picked up her backpack and swung it over her shoulder wondering if it was too soon to say out loud she loved her. What was the appropriate timeline for something like that? 

Adena smiled as she considered Kat, pulling her into her body. Her head fell into the crook of Kat's neck, inhaling her scent and pressing her lips into the soft, sensitive skin. “Thank you for coming.” They were cheek to cheek as she whispered, “I'm going to miss you something terrible.” Adena's hands snaked around her neck, gently fingering the curls there as she peeled back to take in the woman in her arms.

“Adena, I love you.” It slipped from her mouth with such ease she surprised herself.

Adena stopped her ministrations to search Kat's deep brown eyes.

“Is it too soon to say something like that?” 

Adena eyes twinkled with joy as she shook her head, “no.”

“You don't have to say it back. I just wanted…”

Adena placed a finger to Kat's lips. “I love you too.” 

It wasn't long before Kat went back in to capture Adena’s lips with her own. 

The kiss began slow and intentional, then evolved into a passion-filled crescendo.

A honk of a horn signaled her taxi was out front. They reluctantly stopped kissing but had a hard time physically letting go. 

“That's your ride.” 

“I know.”

Still, neither one of them made a move to let go. 

Kat dropped her backpack and guided Adena backwards to the bed.

“Kat?” Adena wore a look of confusion as she sat.

Kat pulled her shirt over head and discarded it as the taxi blew one last time. “What’s another day or two, right?”

Adena smiled, “Are you sure?”

“Me wanting to be with you is the only thing I’m sure about.”

…………………………………  
A day later Adena got word her visa extension was finally approved and they returned to New York together.


	11. All I want is You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A realization is made.

“I want to get married, not today but someday.” 

Kat found it poetic that she was stuck in a suburban Starbucks drive-thru in an SUV with a kid in a backseat and classical music playing in the background. Kat looked at the backseat through the rearview mirror. Of course, the kid was sleep, it was the whole point of going for a joy ride. Kat used her uncle’s kid as an excuse to get out of the house to escape questions about her plans for the future. Yet here they are. She was trapped in a living metaphor. Kat readjusted behind the steering wheel. Why was the seat belt so tight? “Is this because of your mother? You've been different since her visit.”

Adena watched Kat as she drove. “My mother was pushy with the subject but she wasn’t wrong. At least about me, she wasn’t. I want to get married and maybe have kids. I need to know if that’s something you want.”

“We’ve only been dating 2 years.” Her grip on the steering wheel tightened.

Adena picked up on the discomfort. “You don’t have to freak out or anything. It wasn’t a proposal.”

“And if I don’t?” It was an earnest question. 

The car in front of them drove off and she pulled up to order.

Adena stopped and furrowed her brows. “Do you really think you wouldn’t want to?” she asked causing Kat to look over at her.

“Can I take your order?” The voice over the speaker sliced through the tension.

Kat turned back to the speaker. “Can I get a grande caramel macchiato and” she glanced back at Adena, “ what do you want?”

“Tea.”

“A grande mint tea and a slice of lemon pound cake.” Kat finished the order and drove around to the window to pay with her debit card.

The barista handed her card back and disappeared for a couple of minutes before returning with their order. Kat handed over the tea and bag to Adena. She then took her coffee, took a hefty sip and placed it in the cup holder. She continued to drive pulling out into the road.

Adena tried to be patient but got tired of waiting. “So you’re not going to answer the question?”

Kat turned down the radio. She wasn’t ready for this conversation. “Can we just be in the moment and enjoy these next couple of days before you go back to Spain?” Kat placed her hand on her girlfriend’s and entwined their fingers.

There was a long silence before Adena spoke. “If you don’t want it you can say it.”

“Babe, I don’t know.” She couldn’t wrap her head around this conversation right now.

……………………

Kat’s Parents Home

 

Kat was bent over the kitchen island with her cellphone in hand when Adena was passing behind her and stopped at her side. “You said you wouldn’t work.”

Kat could sense the irritation in her girlfriend’s voice and wondered how much of it had to do with earlier. She turned, “I’m not….” Adena’s facial expression signaled a lack of interest in any excuse. “Okay, I am but only for 2 minutes. I need to make sure the scheduled posts rolled out as planned. Look.” She signed out of her accounts and powered off the phone before lifting it for show. “The phone is being put away.”

Adena gave a half-satisfied smile before returning to the kitchen table with her tea. 

Kat watched her girlfriend saunter back to her chair before she heard her father’s big booming voice. “Congratulations Adena you’ve accomplished what no one else has. You got my daughter to put away her cellphone.” 

Kat frowned as she mounted her protest. “I’m not always on my phone.”

“No, sometimes you’re on your laptop,” her mother’s voice wafted in from the living room. 

“Or iPad.” Adena finished.

“Get the flour and start the pasta dough.” Kat’s father directed.

Adena watched her girlfriend reach into the cabinet and pull out flour and sat it on the island. She took the eggs her father handed her from the refrigerator. She reached behind her for the spice rack to retrieve the salt. Kat took the phone from the counter and handed it to Adena.

“Oh, so you CAN cook more things?” Adena teased. 

“Kat can cook” Kat’s father, remarked. “But not as well as me.”

Adena smirked as she watched Kat tie up her hair, wash her hands, and began to pour out the flour. “This is good to know.”

“What? I cook,” Kat exclaimed as her mother and aunt walked into the kitchen.

“You cook like 3 times a month” Adena commented as she dug her fork into the pound cake and took a bite.

“Mommy don’t listen to her. I cook more than that.” Kat cracked an egg in the center of a flour hill.

“Katherine, you’re not letting this girl cook all the time?” 

Adena noticed Kat was splitting image of her mother accept lighter but she definitely got her height from her father.

“First of all, she likes to cook. Tell'em, babe”.

Adena offered no show of support as she continued to devour the lemon pound cake in front of her.

Dr. Edison shake’s her head, “I raised you to be more feminist than this.”

“Mommy. Who are you going to believe? You’re loving one and only daughter or some girl you just met off the street?

“Oh, I’m now just some girl off the street.” Adena feigned hurt.

“It’s a joke, a bad joke. I love you.” She smiles wide and kisses her plain on the mouth careful not to get flour on her.

“I’m glad I’m not the only one that has foot-in-mouth syndrome.” Her cousin Malcolm remarked as he passed through the kitchen. 

“No one asked you, Malcolm. Anyway, It’s not like I assume your cooking or anything.” Kat walked back to the island to finish kneading the dough. “Babe you’re really going to let these people believe I make you do all the cooking. Psshh, as if I can make you do anything.” 

Adena finished her cake and walked the saucer over to the sink. She slipped her arms around Kat’s waist and hugged against her back. “When I have time I like to cook for her. If I didn’t she would eat out 90 percent of the time.”

…………..

Adena took off her hijab and joined Kat on the plush carpet after all the guests and extended family left. The fireplace crackled and the warmth of the fire seeped into the room and their bones. Kat watched the fire as Adena watched her. 

Kat looked back at Adena when she felt Adena move her arm. Adena maneuvered into Kat’s side wrapping Kat’s arm around her. Kat pulled Adena in closer and went back to watching the fire. 

The artist began tracing Kat’s collarbone. Her fingers slowly danced across her clavicle up her neck. Adena gently guided Kat’s face back towards her. “Hey. Whats on your mind?”

“Nothing. I’m content.”

Adena conceded the truth in it. Kat seemed smaller somehow, quieter. She rubbed Kat’s neck and kissed her on the lips. “You sure?” 

“I’m happy you’re here.”

Adena pressed her lips to Kat’s and kissed her once more before settling back into her arms. 

The house was silent as the snow fell outside. 

 

Hours later, Kat’s mother found the girls asleep on the living room floor.

Adena shifted and woke up to Dr. Edison picking up glasses littered around the house. “Let me help you.”

“No, it's not much for me to take care of. Go back to sleep.” Dr. Edison continued on to the kitchen.

Adena sat up and yawned. She saw a glass that was missed and got up and took it to the kitchen sink. She handed the crystal glass to Kat’s mother who was loading the dishwasher. “Thank you.”

“Are you hungry?” Dr. Edison asked as she started the dishwasher.

“No, thank you.” Adena leans against the island.

"Do you want any cake?”

Adena began to smile shyly, "If it’s not too much trouble.”

“Don’t be silly.” Dr. Edison retrieved a plate and cut Adena a slice of caramel cake. “The mother sat the plate down in front of her with an accompanying fork. “This is the last time you get the guest treatment. This is the second time you’ve been spent the night here. The next time you’re on your own.”

“Okay,” the artist smiled as she picked up the fork. “Kat said you specialize in couples counseling.” She took a bite of the cake. “This is so good.”

Dr. Edison was amused, “Yes, I do.”

“In your experience, do people ever change their mind about important things like getting married or having kids?”

“They can and sometimes do.”

“Have you ever seen a relationship last if one person wants to get married and the other don’t? But everything else is great with the relationship otherwise.”

“Not long term, not without one person changing their minds.”

Adena no longer had a taste for cake.

“Is this about you and my daughter?”

“I should go to bed. Tomorrow’s going to be a long day.”

Dr. Edison wanted to pry but she tried not get in the middle of Kat’s relationships if she could help it. “I’ll take care of this,” motioning to the leftover cake, “go to bed.”

The artist was thankful and returned to the living room.

Adena looked over at Kat contemplating whether or not to wake her to go to bed or let her sleep down here. Tonight was the last night they had together before she had to return to Europe to open her show and Kat had to return home for work. She woke her girlfriend by calling her name softly. She waited until Kat turned to look at her before saying “Let's go to bed.”

In the room, Kat undressed and threw on a sleeping a shirt. Adena dressed in her gown and joined Kat in bed. 

Kat pulled in close and began planting soft kisses along Adena’s shoulder and neck. Her hands began to travel the length of skin between Adena’s breasts underneath her gown. She could feel and hear her girlfriend responding and didn’t expect to hear Adena say she was tired. “Did I do something?”

“No,” Adena whispered. She turned in her girlfriend’s arms. “Can you hold me.” She felt Kat encircle her fully with her arms. Adena tucked her head into the crook of Kat’s neck as best as she could. She listened to her breathing and concentrated on the feel of her girlfriend’s soft, warm body holding her in place. 

 

………………..

 

A Day Later in New York

Kat stripped down to her underwear, unceremoniously collapsing into bed. She pulled the covers up, over her body as she laid on her side staring at Adena’s empty side of the bed. She thought of Marriage. A hypothetical forever. Until death do us part or we hate each other, whichever comes first. She reached for her cell and scrolled her contacts before hitting call.

 

Adena’s hand reached out to grab her cell off the side table and brought it to her face as she scrunches her eyes to make out the blinking name. She answered the phone. “Kat? Is something wrong?” 

“Why does anything have to be wrong?” Kat stared at the ceiling into darkness.

“Because it’s nearly 2 am there, its a weeknight, and you sound drunk.”

“I’m not drunk. I’ve had drinks, there is a difference.”

“Am I to assume Sutton and Jane are responsible for your present condition?”

Kat pulled Adena’s pillow into her face. It smelled like her, a light white musk with a hint of rose. “My present condition involves me in our bed alone thinking about you. I blame you.”

“Honey.”

She has no idea what time it was in Spain. “I woke you up, didn’t I? Go back to sleep.”

“You called for a reason.” Adena sat up in bed and pushed her hair out of her face.

“Marriage is serious,” Kat started before being cut off by Adena. “I know.”

“And Statistics,” Kat’s began before being cut off again. “I know.”

“I’m not ready for marriage,” Kat sighed.

“I’m not either but I do want it one day.” 

Kat threw her arms over her eyes, “You know I love you, right? Me, not wanting to get married has nothing to do with how much I love you.” 

“Kat I have to go. I need to take a shower and make it over to the gallery.” 

“Adena, are we going to be okay?”

There was a long, uncomfortable silence before Adena responded, “yeah.”

It was the first time Kat didn’t believe her.


	12. Fragmented

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That one time they broke up.

“Hami please take the phone and talk to the girl. I don’t know what language either of you are speaking and I’m tired of being in the middle.” Kat heard grumbling in Persian, complaining sounded the same in any language. When Adena’s father got on the phone she initially couldn’t tell until she said Hello to check and he cleared his throat. She got a small taste of what it must've been like for Adena. Kat didn’t know how to respond to such a strange dynamic. Why bother getting on the phone with her if he wouldn’t speak. So she did the only thing that made sense to her and started relaying the instruction for how to finish setting up the software she sent back with Mrs. El Amin. It took all of 15 minutes and they were done and not once did he actually speak. She knew the setup was successful when Mrs. El Amin returned to the phone and thanked her. 

“Well that was weird,” Kat absentmindedly commented.

“Try not to take it personally.”

“I’m good.”

“Thank you. Send Ada our love.”

Kat put her phone away after hearing the key turn in the door. Adena was home. She greeted her with a kiss at the door, welcoming her home. 

“How was Spain?” Kat asked as she carried Adena’s bags to the bedroom.

“I spent most of my time in the gallery, the hotel, and a local cafe so I wouldn't starve so I really couldn’t say.” Adena took off her floral hijab and hung up her coat before putting away her camera.

“Maybe next time I'll go with you,” came from the bedroom.

A wistful smile graced Adena’s lips for a moment. She was glad to be in the comfort of her own home. She commenced to taking off her boots and placing them away in the hall closet. 

Adena followed her girlfriend into the kitchen. “I hope you're hungry,” Kat grinned. Adena gave her a curious look stepping into the kitchen. The lights were off but there candles and plates, silverware, and an iced bottle of her favorite Italian soda. “What’s the occasion?” 

“Your home. Isn’t that enough?” Kat motioned for her to have a seat and began serving her. 

Adena examined the plate of Chilean sea bass with reduced blueberry sauce, rice, and grilled vegetables set down before her. “I can't believe you cooked this. You’ve been holding out.” 

“Well, I can't have my parents thinking I mistreat you.” Kat took a seat.

“No one would ever think that.” 

Kat waited for her girlfriend to taste the food before she started. She watched carefully as she took the first bite of the fish. “This looks wonderful but tastes better. You’re a good cook.” Kat smiled satisfactorily. “But not better than me,” she teased.

 

After hours of making love, Kat and Adena were sprawled out naked on the bed with Kat’s head lying on Adena’s stomach. The artist cradled Kat’s head in her hand as she thought about their lives together. 

Eventually, talks of marriage faded into the background as the day to day aspect of their shared life fell back into a groove. Then, Fahim called. 

“Adena, I finally did it. I proposed to Sameena and she said yes.” She was thrilled for her brother. They talked another half hour about plans and laughing at their mother’s exaggerated reaction. 

 

That was a week ago. Adena never brought it up until now.

Adena was apprehensive as she walked from the bedroom to the living room to sit across from Kat on the coffee table. “Atashe delam, we need to talk.” 

Kat drew close her laptop and placed it beside her on the couch. 

She had Kat’s attention. “My brother called last week.” 

“How is he?”

“He got engaged to his girlfriend.” 

Kat’s spidey senses began tingling. 

“Talking with my brother reminded me of how much I want that for myself. And one day I hoped to have it with you.”

“Adena…”

Adena briefly stared at the floor as she said, “I know you don't want it and I don’t know a way we can get around it.”

Kat knew where this was leading and heart began pounding. “I want you. I want a life with you. We have a life together now.” 

Adena looked up with misty eyes. “I love you. I love our life together but where is this going?”

“Why does it have to be all or nothing?” Kat's voice is panicked as Adena clutches her hands. “Adena don’t do this”

“I don’t want to.” Adena’s eyes spilled over.

“Then don’t,” Kat pleaded. 

“I won’t change my mind about marriage and you have your reasons for not wanting it, none of which I understand. I think we should, maybe it would be best...” Adena’s voice cracks, “if we break up.”

Kat pried her hands away from Adena “You said we would be okay.” She was openly crying and went in search of her shoes, coat, and purse. “Kat where are you going it’s the middle of the night? Stay.” Kat shook her head as to shake off the cocktail of emotions that was sending her into a tailspin. “Please, don’t do anything impulsive,” Adena called to her retreating back. 

“You don’t get to break my heart and tell me how to handle it.” Kat opened the door and walked through it pulling on her coat, leaving the front door wide open as she ran downstairs. 

Adena ran out into the hall after her, calling her name but she was gone.

Adena ran back into the apartment heading for her cell to call Kat. She paced with impatience as she urged Kat to pick up the phone as it began to ring.

Ringing. Adena turned toward the offending object on the coffee table. Kat left her phone. Kat never leaves her phone. A dejected Adena clicked off the call and sat on the couch. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. ‘What did I do?” 

Kat came home early the next morning to get ready for work. Adena was asleep on the couch.

Adena sits up groggily at the sound of the shower. She looks around and realizes Kat was back home. She shut her eyes and exhaled a deep breath. It was a long night and the day wasn’t looking any better. She propelled herself from the couch and headed for the bathroom.

Kat was already in the shower with steam quickly filling the bathroom.

“I was worried about you,” Kat heard from the other side of the shower curtain. “You left your phone.”

Kat stopped her soapy ministrations and looked up with overflowing eyes. “I can’t do this right now.” She didn’t even know what this was but she knew she didn’t have the energy to deal. She hadn’t slept all night, her heart was shattered, and she has to spend the day pretending like she is fine.

Adena’s voice lowered to almost a whisper, “I just need to know your okay.”

“Adena. Please. Leave me alone.” 

The artist didn’t bother to hold back the tears as they fell. She didn’t say anything only closed the bathroom door behind her. 

Once Kat heard the click of the door she began to openly sob.

Adena got dressed in a rush and went to her art studio.

When Kat emerged from the bathroom, she carefully moved through the apartment until she realized Adena was gone.

……….

Kat picked up the phone a dozen different times to text Adena but ultimately erasing anything typed to move along to any one of Scarlet’s social media pages. The morning was rough but as the day picked up she could finally focus on work. By 2 pm, she no longer felt like she was dying of a literal heart attack. And by 7 pm she thought she was ready to go home and deal with the fall out after telling Sutton and Jane that she and Adena were over. They were shocked and didn’t pry too much because she wasn’t ready. There were minor tears, considering.

Adena spent the morning telling herself she made the wrong choice. It was lunacy. Their relationship works, it worked she reminded herself. Traveling and all. Immigration and all. Sexuality and all. It worked. They fit. Maybe she didn’t need marriage and children. Kat is all she needed, she spent the morning trying to convince herself.

“Adena if this is how you two really feel, what is there to do? You are making the right choice. You are making the only choice,” Firuze said offering the best support she could given the circumstances.

“If it’s the right choice why does it feel like I’m ripping out my own heart?” Firuze held her friend as she wept.

“Because you love her and she loves you and no one did anything wrong. It’s not wrong for her to want what she wants and it’s not wrong for you to want what you do.”

……...

 

Adena was waiting in the kitchen at the table when Kat returned home. “I’ll move out but I need time to find a new place. I’ll pay my share of the rent until the end of the lease.”

“Well, I guess that’s it.” The light went out of Kat’s eyes and a wall went up.

Adena saw it and approached Kat. “I love you and want you in my life.” 

Kat responded by walking away to her room and closing the door.

Not a whole lot changed after they ended the relationship. Adena moved into the second bedroom. Kat worked later and found any excuse to come home late enough to only sleep. Adena spent more time in the studio. Initially, chance run-ins were painfully awkward or argumentative. Then after a few weeks, they settled into a new type of normal. 

Even though they were officially over Kat took solace in the proximity to Adena although she wouldn’t say it. They both did. Adena would cook and still leave her a plate warm on the stove. Once in a while, they would sit and share a meal together. They began to occupy the same room in the house without wanting to escape again.

“What's going on with you two” Jane poked at her at their local dive bar. “How can you two possibly live together after breaking up?”

“Have you seen rent prices?” Kat laughed and took a sip of her whiskey.

“Kat this is no good for you.” Jane tried to get her to see reason but Kat didn’t want to think about it at all. Instead, she finished her whiskey and ordered another.

 

Kat came home with the warmth of alcohol still buzzing through her system. Adena was sitting on the couch tucked in a corner with a blanket wrapped around her watching something on Netflix. “There’s food if you’re hungry.” 

Kat didn’t reply. Jane’s words were looming in her head.

Kat disappeared into the bedroom and went straight to the shower.

Adena wondered what had Kat out so late. Or who? Her stomach knotted. 

Kat padded through the living room to the kitchen in a t-shirt and pajama pants almost 40 minutes later. Adena knew because she watched the clock. She heard the kitchen sink come on, run for several seconds, and shut off. Not long after, Kat returned to what used to be their bedroom with a glass of water in hand.

After a few minutes, Adena heard a glass shatter and Kat curse, “Fuck!”

Kat drank a little more alcohol than she should and now glass was all over the floor.

Adena appeared in the doorway and saw Kat standing next to the bed with glass and water surrounding her. “Sit down,” Adena instructed and Kat listened as she retrieved a bag, broom/dustpan, and towel. The artist took care of the mess and returned to check if Kat was alright.

Adena was standing in front of Kat with concern in her eyes and her sleeping shorts hanging loosely from her hips. “You didn’t step on any glass did you?”

Kat never knew you could miss someone who was right next to you. She missed talking to her, really talking. She missed being touched by her. She missed waking up to the weight of her body. She simply missed her. 

Kat reached out and held Adena’s waist causing Adena to look down at her with questions in her eyes. 

Kat's longing facial expression affected Adena making it difficult to continue the facade while gazing into dark brown eyes.. 

Kat’s hand moved from Adena's waist and took her hand. She raised Adena’s hand to her cheek and closed her eyes. She was tired of this limbo. 

Adena's heart ached.

She caressed Kat's cheek and pressed her forehead into her love’s. 

Kat's hands grabbed firm to Adena's hips pulling her in closer. 

Kat’s mouth stayed suspended below Adena’s. The warmth of their breath mixing, drawing each further into the other’s center of gravity. Kat’s hands began to travel below Adena’s shirt and up her spine. The artist breathing deepened forcing her to close the distance between their lips. 

Adena moaned into Kat’s mouth and she felt all of her melt into her lover’s touch.

Somewhere between rushed kisses and frantic hands, they began to slow down. What began as a primal need to touch, be touched, and to get off turned in to something else altogether. They began to make love again. 

…...

Adena laid in bed next to a sleeping Kat wondering what the hell she was doing? Where do they go from here? Has anything changed? She didn’t know. She only knew that she couldn’t resist Kat. She loved her too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback feeds me.


	13. Inversion I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm getting out of the control with this story. I'll most likely end it in 2-3 more updates. Thanks all who still take the time to comment. You keep me going.

Kat and Adena laid in bed the next morning. 

Kat opened her eyes, blinking a few times before focusing on the ceiling of her bedroom. There was a dull ache behind her eyes that made her reach for her head. She groaned. When she brought down her hand she noticed Adena in her peripheral lying next to her.

Kat thought about last night and the memory of Adena moving against her, her clutching a hand full of her hair, moaning, and her mouth clamping down on her neck as she climaxed. 

Adena knew they had crossed a line last night that was starting to feel more and more arbitrary. She knew better. They were backtracking into complicated territory. But the way the morning dawn’s oranges and yellows settled through the window overshadowing Kat’s face made her want to go back to last night despite the resulting confusion. Kat had always been her greatest temptation but she needed to be stronger than that for both of their sakes. “We can’t do that again?”

Kat was prepared this time and was unmoved, at least outwardly. She was through crying. She knew she forced the issue last night and Adena chose. “Okay.” 

Adena got up, gathered her clothes, and went to the spare bedroom.

 

The next day, Kat texted Jane and Sutton to see what they were doing. Jane couldn’t talk because of some embedded story she was covering. Sutton was still at the office trying to barter access to the limited Tory Burch collection of handbags. No surprise there.

Kat went back and scrolled through her list of contacts. Her perfectly manicured finger hovered over the call symbol before pressing. The phone rang and then an answer. “Hey, Trevor…”

 

Kat hung around the house for most of the day until it was time to get ready for her date. She took a shower and chose an outfit. She wasn’t interested in overthinking it, deciding on a simple black dress and heels. Ultimately, leaving her hair down. 

Adena was in the kitchen prepping her dinner when Kat walked through to grab her spare charger for her phone. Adena took notice of Kat's dress. She only wore dresses for formal events and dates. “You look nice.”

“Thanks,” Kat reflexively responded without looking at Adena. 

Adena returned to dicing vegetables for her stir fry. “Do you want me to a put a plate away for you?”

“Don't worry about it, I'll be out late.” Kat found her spare charger in a kitchen drawer and shoved it in her purse before leaving Adena to her cooking. 

Adena’s jaw tightened, resisting the urge to ask more questions.

 

Trevor was waiting for her at the tapas bar in Manhattan. She was escorted to her table where he was waiting. He stood to greet her with a hug. “I was surprised when you called me. You know being married and all.”

“Yeah, about that…”

 

 

The next morning, Adena was leaving the apartment when Kat pulled up in an Uber. She was getting out of the car when Adena noticed a male in a back seat. Adena's stomach dropped. She didn't remember his name but she remembered his face. 

Adena stood there on the sidewalk staring for what seemed the longest time. She noticed Kat was dressed in the same clothes from the night before. She had to get out of there suddenly finding it difficult to breathe. 

 

 

Firuze followed Adena out of the office into the open space of the art studio, disbelieving what she was hearing. “Adena why would you abandon all you have worked for over the past years?”

The artist took the clipboard and pen from her manager and began signing checks and general paperwork. “I thought you were on my side.” 

Firuze tried to keep her voice down given the presence of a few models and Adena’s new part-time assistant. “I’m always on your side but I can't support something I think you’ll regret.”

“Khoob hastam.” Adena handed back the clipboard and pen upon finishing.

“You are anything but fine Adena. I can see it in your eyes. Something else must have happened? What aren’t you saying?” Firuze saw a conflicted look cross her face which prompted her to reach out and place a hand on her friend’s shoulder. “What do you want? Tell me and I’ll move heaven and earth to get it. But this, I don’t know what to do with this.” Adena ignored her question and asked her to review the contract that Scarlett sent her for freelance work.

Firuze walked away shaking her head, “You are too stubborn for your own good.”

The artist directed her new part-time assistant, Lori, to reposition the lights before Adena switched the lens on her camera. She was ready to finish this shoot and be done for today. She was having a hard time focusing and wasn’t sure she was even getting the shots she needed. 

Firuze excused herself to the office before pulling out her phone and dialing.

Kat was at the apartment napping after having showered and changed that morning. She blindly reached for the ringing phone not far from her on the bed. “Hello.”

“Kat. Can you come down to the studio and please talk to her.”

“I don't think I'm the best person for whatever is going on. I'm sure you know, we're not together anymore.” 

“I know but if you still care for her the way I know she cares for you, you will come. Something is going on with her and she's about to make a huge mistake.” 

Kat had no idea what this could be about but she knew Firuze wasn’t one for exaggeration. “Give me a couple of hours.” 

“I’ll make sure she stays here.”

 

 

Adena was sitting with her head planted in between her folded arms on the desk when Kat closed the door behind her. “It’s about time…,” Adena mumbled thinking it was her manager with her latest contract to go over. She glanced up and Kat was standing in front of her desk. 

Kat could see Adena was not expecting her. “Firuze called me.”

Adena sat up straight and subtlety looked Kat over. She was dressed in a pair of jeans and a button up short sleeve white shirt. Her hair was still down and her peacoat was in her hand. “She shouldn't have done that.”

“What's going on?” Kat pulled up a seat in one of the two free chairs across from Adena’s desk and tossed her coat on the empty one. 

Adena's eyes were heavy with sadness. “I saw you with him.”

Kat knew the 'him' by which she was referring. 

“You could have waited until after I moved out or at least have been more discreet. You wanted to hurt me.”

Kat brows knitted together, “No.” She wasn’t trying to hurt her, at least she didn't think so. “I don't know, maybe” she wanted to a little bit. “But more than anything I didn’t want to hurt anymore.”

Adena's head tilted, “Did he?”

Kat was confused. “Did he, what?” 

“Help you stop hurting.”

Kat felt Adena’s eyes searing into her. “I didn’t sleep with him.”

“I didn’t ask,” rushed from Adena’s mouth with a hint of agitation.

“You didn’t have to, I see it in how you’re looking at me. You were thinking it.”

Adena’s silence and the way she looked down at nothing in particular on her desk told Kat she was right.

“Nothing happened last night.” She wanted Adena to know this despite the cyclone of mixed emotions swirling within her since the break-up.

“You spent the entire night with him.” She remembered when they had their first night together. They didn't have sex but they were dangerously close to it. 

“I met Trevor at a bar. We talked, had a few drinks. He invited me back to his place. We kissed. I started crying. Apparently, he wasn’t into having sex with the sad girl. So I spent the night on his couch watching him play Xbox 360 because I didn’t want to come home.” She didn’t want to be confronted with Adena’s rejection and thinking about it now was making her upset. “And what if I did sleep with him? What then? You broke up with me and made it very clear we’re done. So You don’t get to be angry with me. I'm mad at you because you did this to us. We were fine and you broke us.” 

“I was trying to avoid. ..this. This pain.” 

“I know why you did it... it still hurts.”

Adena stood and walked around the desk to sit on the edge of the chair next to Kat. “Have I lost you?” Her voice was small and her eyes held remorse. 

“Adena, I haven’t gone anywhere. I’m right here.”

Adena started to think maybe she was the lost one. “Nothing has felt right since we broke up. I miss you all the time. My work has suffered and leaving New York…”

“That’s why Firuze called me, you're leaving?” Kat was visibly surprised as she shifted her body away from Adena’s. “What happened to staying still and building a home?”

“I meant it when I said it. I still do but I hoped that would be with you. Not being with you is harder than I imagined.”

Kat shook her head as she stood and gathered her coat and clutch. “I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t like feeling like this. You don’t even know the power you have over me. It’s like I’m waiting for you to decide whether I get to be happy and I’m done. I can't do it anymore. You win. If you want to leave I won't try to stop you.”

Kat’s phone chimed signaling a text. She didn’t bother to look at it. “Bye Adena.”

There was a finality to her tone that quietly shook the artist. 

Kat went to the door to leave when a desperate Adena hurried behind her, slamming it shut with the full weight of her body behind her right hand as her left held Kat by the waist. “I want you,” declared.

“What?” Kat turned around in between Adena’s arms.

Adena released the door and took a step back. “Firuze asked me what I wanted earlier and I never answered.” The forlorn woman looked down and took a breath before meeting Kat's eyes once more. “I want us together. I don't want you with anyone who’s not me and I know I did this but it's not what I want. I never did, not really. I want you.” Each word was a plea. “Please, don't leave.” Adena took hold of Kat’s hands and guided them back to the chairs to sit. Kat didn’t protest.

“What happens the next time you decide what we have isn’t enough? That I'm not enough.”

“Don’t say that, you will always be more than enough.” The artist didn't want to let Kat’s hands go, afraid the younger woman would somehow vanish from her life if she released her. “I don’t need marriage as long as I have you.”

“You know...I convinced myself I wouldn't be good in a relationship,” Kat began. “I knew I would mess it up somehow but by some miracle, I didn't. I was able to believe in us because I believed in you completely. Then you left me.” Kat’s voice wavered. “So forgive me if it's hard for me to believe you when you say that.” She studied there hand's together, finding it difficult to meet Adena's eyes. She was trying to fight back the tears that were threatening to fall. 

“Do you believe I love you?” There was a tremble in Adena's voice that compelled Kat to raise her head. Adena tears flowed like a silent river down her face causing Kat’s eyes to spill over. 

Kat could only give a silent nod as she blinked causing more rogue tears to escape in spite of her trying to force them back. 

Adena went from sitting in her chair to kneeling in front of Kat. She spread Kat’s legs, wrapped her arms around her waist, and laid her head on one of her thighs. 

Kat removed Adena's emerald hijab carefully placing it on the desk next to her. She ran her fingers gently through Adena’s hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear.

“I love you so much.” 

“You broke my heart.”

“I’m sorry. If it’s any consolation I broke mine’s too.”

Kat did her best to wipe any signs of tears from her face and encouraged Adena to stand. Kat followed suit and stood to put on her coat. Adena watched feeling defeated until Kat picked up her clutch and held out her hand. “You ready to go home?”

Adena's eyes brightened as she wrapped her hijab and gathered her things to go. She revealed a demure smile and took Kat’s hand.

Firuze watched the office door open and Kat and Adena walked out hand in hand. “Here’s that contract,” she called. Kat waited by the door while Adena approached Firuze. “Read it over but it looks as if Scarlett is giving you everything we asked for.” She handed over the folder with the contract inside. 

“It took all of this time to locate the contract?” Adena was well aware this orchestration was all her doing. Firuze gave a reticent smirk. 

“Thank you.”

The manager glanced from Kat back to Adena. “I told you I would move heaven and earth to get you what you want.”

Adena hugged her friend, “Goodnight, Firuze.”

“Have a good night you two.”

Kat waved bye to the woman who somehow managed to reconnect them for the second time. While Kat wasn’t sure they were officially back together they weren’t ‘not together’.


	14. Gravity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Today was a good day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo, this update was a long time coming. I swear I will finish this story by hook or by crook. 
> 
> This story is fully off the rails. lol. 
> 
> But yay there is only one chapter left after this. No, truly I mean it! Then I can go back to writing about the twins. 
> 
> Thanks for the love. You guys really did push me to get back to this story so never underestimate the power of feedback.

It was safe to say Adena and Kat were back together. They didn’t speak much about the break. Adena waited for a sign Kat wanted to talk but one never came. Instead, Kat invited her back into their bedroom and they made love all night.

 

A week later...

 

Adena reached for Kat's hips underneath the sheets and pulled her into her body. “What time does your flight leave tomorrow?” Kat asked as her girlfriend's hands slipped effortlessly underneath her sleeping shirt. 

“Seven,” is all Kat heard as she shut her eyes and delighted in Adena massaging her breast. “Spend the day with me,” came next. Kat licked her lips and her eyes fluttered open. She wore an apologetic look. “I would babe but you know, work.” 

Adena beginning leaving a trail of languid kisses down the side of Kat’s neck as her hand continued its manipulation.

“I know what you're doing, “ Kat moaned. 

“Is it working?” Adena questioned in between kisses.

Kat could only imagine how pleased Adena was with herself.

 

The two women cuddled on the couch with a light throw over their legs. 

Adena studied her interlocked fingers with her love’s. “We should get dressed and go out.”

Kat readjusted and spooned Adena with a snug hold from the back. “But we're so comfortable here.” 

Adena clutched one of Kat’s hands to her heart. “I want to do things with you before I leave tomorrow.” 

“I want to do things with you that does not involve going out.” Adena could feel the rise of her love’s cheek and what she could guess was a scandalous grin that donned Kat’s face as she whispered: “I mean... it can if you're feeling that kinky today” into Adena’s ear. 

 

 

The temperature seemed to drop 10 degrees by the river. It was too cold to be strolling along it if you were to ask Kat. It didn’t feel like spring no matter what the calendar said. Adena, on the other hand, wasn't going to let a little cold weather keep her from enjoying her pistachio gelato.

They walked arm in arm as Kat eyed Adena’s cone. “I can't believe you're eating gelato in this weather.” 

Adena was amused and continued on licking her creamy delights which only made it more appealing to Kat. “Can I have some?” 

“I thought you didn't want any. I mean that is what you said back at the bakery.” Adena’s brow quirked to emphasize her point.

Kat began to pout. “I didn't want to carry it, it's cold.” She said with a whine that was wholly unnecessary.”

“Here you big baby.” Adena held up the cone. 

Kat smiled at the small victory as she bent down to taste. She found Adena's lips instead. Kat pulled back with a smile. “Why are you being a tease?”

“Because I know how you’re easily frustrated. Adena kissed her once more and then shared her cone. 

 

Kat sat down after placing both of their plates down on the kitchen table. She watched Adena pick up her fork, angle up at her and smile before digging into her angel hair pasta. Kat waited for Adena to swallow her first bite and comment as were her routine when she cooked for her. Adena took a sip of her Italian soda and beamed back at her girlfriend, “It’s perfection.” Kat returned a satisfied smile and began eating. 

Adena watched Kat finish her second glass of wine before standing and crossing the short distance between the two. Two glasses were always the magic number. Kat was about to stand and Adena pressed a firm hand to her chest to push her back down in her seat. Kat didn’t react. She followed Adena’s hand from her chest, up her arm, over her face to stare into her eyes. 

Adena straddled Kat and returned Kat’s stare like a dare before closing the distance. Their lips met and began speaking its own love language. Kat’s hands encircled Adena’s waist and slowly began to wind up her back causing Adena to playfully pull away from the kiss and force Kat’s hands down to her sides. She lifted Kat’s Hendrix shirt over her head and left it to drop to the floor. She unhooked her bra with one hand taking the opportunity to relieve Kat of the unnecessary support. 

Kat went to reach for Adena’s button down. She was pleased when no resistance came as she carefully loosened every button and watched the material slip from love’s shoulders to the floor. Adena wasn’t wearing a bra. Kat’s hands became greedy, caressing the fullness of Adena’s body before stopped once more. “Stop distracting me,” Adena whispered into her mouth as she held Kat’s throat gently before closing her eyes. She pressed down into her lips and began kissing her with abandonment. Kat’s body and head were pushed to the back of the chair by the gravity of Adena’s own body leaving Kat to hold onto the chair with one hand and using the other to hold onto Adena’s hip. 

Adena planted a kiss underneath her ear causing Kat to crane her neck further. Adena began to lament in Farsi about the love she has for Kat’s neck as she peppered kisses down its length, eliciting the right amount of moans. She stood and returned to kissing her love as her fingers skillfully unbuttoned and unzipped Kat’s pants. Her fingers wasted no time dipping into her heat drawing a throaty groan from Kat. Adena allowed her fingers to settle there and luxuriate in Kat’s pooling wetness. On her way out, she was sure to tease Kat’s clit with enough pressure to make her moan loudly in frustration.

Adena pulled away from the kiss with a glint of mischief in her eye. Kat watched her take her arousal from her fingers and suck it clean off. She could only bite her bottom lip anxious to see what she would do next. 

Adena had enough of the chair and took one of Kat’s hands and guided her to the bed where they got rid of what remained of their clothing. Adena was about to reach for the special box underneath the bed when Kat stopped her. “Hey, I just want to feel you.” 

Adena took in the tenderness with which she said it before laying across Kat’s body and taking her mouth into her own. 

 

4 am

Kat eyes blinked open with the knowledge Adena would have to get up soon to leave for the airport. She took the time to study her, all of her. The rise and fall of her bare back as she slept. The way her hair curled slightly went left alone or the way it sticks to the sides of her face after an athletic round of sex. The way she seemed to search her out even in her sleep.

Adena hand blindly began reaching behind her until she felt Kat’s hand and wrapped it around her. “I wish you didn’t have to leave.” It was Kat speaking to Adena’s back.

Adena rolled to her back. “I’m coming back.”

“You sure?” There was a laugh that sounded forced and awkward.

The artist could see through her girlfriend’s poor joke and cupped a cute chubby cheek. Kat wasn’t built to obfuscate her emotions. She didn’t know how. To be good at lying one needed to able to sit with discomfort and be unbothered. That wasn’t Kat. She couldn’t inhabit a dishonest space too long. It wasn’t a muscle she was used to exercising. “Kat, something tells me I will always find my way back to you.” 

The tension around Kat’s eyes melted away. She took time to take in the soft curves and lines of the face she adores. Adena was looking back at her with a curious smile. 

But Kat didn’t want to overanalyze. She didn’t want to think at all. Because if she took time to think, she would think about how much she loves Adena and how that scares the shit out of her. If she let herself think too much, she’d run away, now knowing the pitfalls that lay ahead. Fully knowing another person, being intertwined in their lives, was difficult. There are times she wants to pull away and despite that instinct, she finds herself right back where she began, wanting Adena. There was an invisible string, a magnetic pull that kept her coming back, that allowed her to let Adena come back. She loves Adena but loving her scares her in a way it didn’t before. So instead of thinking, she gave into feeling. Nerve endings on fire, supple skin, warmth, heat and wetness. Kat leaned in and caught Adena’s lips, firm and sure.

Adena was caught off guard but quickly acclimated, settling in to receive all of what Kat was offering.

Kat’s lips confidently made their way down Adena’s naked form before taking her with her mouth. 

 

**************************************

 

Kat was in a staff meeting with her team when the first notification rang on her phone indicating a google alert as it often did. She wrapped up the meeting and checked her phone for the time as her team filed out. 

She noticed Adena left a message. Kat took the time to listen smiling unconsciously as she listened to her voice. She missed her usual connecting flight in Paris to Tehran through Air France. She was going to try and get a seat on British Airways. “My brother better appreciate all I’m going through to get there and see his face on his birthday. I have to go, the line is moving. Love you.”

More alerts went off. She dismissed them as she texted Adena. “Hey, just got out of a meeting. Sorry, I missed your call. Call me when you can.” It had been two hours since she called.

She eyed her phone for a minute before locking the screen, picking up her files, and standing to head to her office and continue on with her work. Maybe she made the flight, she thought. Then her phone went berserk. A cascade of alerts, notifications began to sound off relentlessly. 

Kat frowned wondering why her phone was lighting up like a Christmas tree. She rolled her eyes and began to check her notifications.

 

…..

 

Alex was the first to notice the change in Kat through the glass walls of the conference room. He noticed she went unusually still and there was an indiscernible expression on her face. He walked from his desk to the conference room. Up close she looked Petrified. “Kat?” They weren’t best friends like Sutton and Jane but they had grown close and it was clear something was wrong. 

“Adena,” came out like a gasp as she continued to stare at her phone.

He took her phone and saw one of several alerts of a bombing at Paris’ Charles de Gaulle international airport. “What do you need?”

Kat could see Alex face but couldn’t hear anything he said. 

Alex didn’t know what to do so he did the only thing that he could think of. He located Sutton with urgency. He unceremoniously charged into Oliver’s office. Oliver and Sutton were still at the office re-working looks for next issue. 

“Sutton.”

“Mr. Crawford you better have a good reason…” Oliver stopped mid-sentence when he saw the distress written over Alex’s face.

Sutton registered the panic look on Alex’s face as well and knew something was wrong. Alex didn't panic, he was one of the most level-headed people she knew. So when she saw his face she knew something was wrong. “What happened?” 

“It’s Kat.” She walked over to him. “There was a bombing at Paris’ international airport.” Alex looked from Sutton to Oliver and back. “Adena was at the airport.”

Sutton dropped the swatch book she holding back onto the desk and took off in search of her best friend.

Kat felt Sutton before she heard her. “Kat?” Her arms circled Kats neck for a supportive hug before pulling away.

Sutton stared at her and for a moment this all felt surreal. “What do we know?”

“I don’t know anything. I know she missed her connecting flight in Paris and was going to Connect to British Airways. I don’t know if she was able to get a seat. She was supposed to call back but she didn’t. I missed her last call.”

Kat began to dial her number hoping she would pick up and say this was all a ridiculous misunderstanding and that she was safe on the plane. What Kat received instead was Adena’s phone going straight to voicemail. If this was any ordinary situation she would hang up before reaching voicemail. This time she needed to hear her voice even if it was only a message. It was in English and Farsi.

Kat’s hands began to tremble, eyes filled instantly, and she began to hyperventilate. She was having another panic attack. Everything felt surreal and it was hard to focus on anything but the terror that hijacked her senses. After a few minutes, she was able to register the feel of Sutton’s hands clutching hers and coaching her to breathe. 

Jacqueline was standing in her doorway taking in the unusual demeanor of her social media director. She became concerned and motioned for Alex and Sutton to escort Kat into her office where she closed the curtains to keep other staffers from prying. 

Alex gave Jacqueline a rundown of things as he understood them. “Alex contact British Airways and find out how we can confirm if Adena made that flight.”

He gave a nod of the head and rushed to his desk to start making calls.

Kat’s phone began to ring but she seemed unable to register it. Sutton took the cell phone from her hand, scrambling to answer the phone, and placing it on speakerphone.

Hearing Adena manager’s voice seems to break the spell Kat was under. “Firuze! Have you spoken to her.”

“So you’ve heard. No, I had hoped you had spoken to her.”

They both discussed the last communications they had with her trying to establish a timeline. Praying that all of their calculations meant that she made the flight before the bombing.

The British Airways flight wouldn’t land for another 3 hours if she did make it.

Another call began coming through. 

“Firuzi, I have to go Adena’s brother is calling. Call me if you find out more.”

“You too. Kat, remember Adena is a survivor.”

She couldn’t say anything afraid her voice would fail her.

“Bye Kat.”

Kat took the phone off the speaker to answer the next call.

“Kat, salaam.”

Salaam Fahim.

“Where is she? Maman is worried. We’re all worried.”

Kat told him what she knew.

Jacqueline and Sutton looked on as Kat paced the floor talking to Adena’s brother.

“Call us. I’m going to head out to the airport in a couple of hours if I don’t hear any new information.” 

 

Alex checked back in noting the airline phone lines were busy. It took him another 40 minutes to finally get through to someone only to be told they can’t release details like that at this time to anyone who wasn’t next of kin. Kat overheard and snatched from the phone from Alex. 

Kat was desperate for any signs of hope. Jacqueline watched Kat closely taking in her vulnerability and fear. The boss wasn’t surprised when Kat introduced herself as Adena’s wife and explained the circumstances. It was clear by now, she would do anything for the Muslim artist. It was also clear Kat didn’t get the information she wanted to hear the way her face fell when she clicked off the phone call.

She held the phone securely with both hands as she stared down at it.

“What did they say, “ Sutton held Kat’s forearm. Kat looked at her friend. “They don’t have her name on the passenger manifest.” They both knew what that likely meant. She was at the airport when the bombing occurred.

“Hey,” Sutton could see Kat wilting under the weight of this new information. “This doesn’t mean anything. She’s safe. Okay?” She made sure Kat was with her and agreed.

Kat shook her head but the woman was holding on by a thread.

“Is there anyone I could call for you?” her boss asked. However, Kat was distracted by the new information coming out of France.

Numbers of the confirmed dead began to roll out.

The AP Press released new information.  
11 confirmed dead, dozens more injured.

Kat felt like she was losing her mind. She couldn’t stand feeling this way while her co-workers watched. She felt the tears threatening to overwhelm her. She had to get out of there. “I can’t do this,” she mumbled to no one in particular. She heard Jacqueline call after her as she sprinted out the door forcing Sutton to chase after her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there are any prompts or things you would like to see in the last chapter drop a note. I can't guarantee I will write but I will consider it.


	15. Home  Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did it you guys. I actually completed this chapter. This is pretty much it unless I throw out an epilogue and maybe scenes that didn't make the cut. We'll see. Thanks for hanging in with me. I can't say this chapter lived up to the hype but for bad or good it's done.

Kat didn’t know where she was running. She only knew she needed to move - to get out of Scarlett. So she let her feet carry her through the door with the exit sign above and gravity did the rest when she hit the stairs. When she landed on ground-level she kept moving out to the lobby through the main exit and onto the bustling New York sidewalk. 

The cool air hit her face, a welcome change from the stagnant air of Scarlett. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply releasing some of her frantic anxiety. Her eyes opened and adjusted to the throngs of people moving on with their day. Kat on the other hand only wanted to breathe easy and free. And she knew no matter how much she forced herself to breathe in and out and attempt to steady her breathing this feeling - this tightness in her chest wouldn’t relent until she knew Adena was safe. 

Kat had to get to Adena. She pushed off in the direction of their apartment. She didn’t get far before Sutton called her name and threw her arms around her shoulders from the back to hold her in place. “Where are you going?” 

“Home.” 

Sutton turned her friend around to face her. “You don’t have your purse.” Sutton checked Kat’s hands. “Your keys? How were planning on getting into your building?”

“I can’t sit around and do nothing.” It wasn’t her way. She needed to move - to so something. 

Sutton understood this. “Come back upstairs with me. Give me 10 min to smooth things over with Oliver and I’ll go back with you to your place.” 

“You don’t have to babysit me.” 

“Yes, I do. There's no telling what you'll do if left alone. I‘m texting Jane to meet us at your place.”

“Sutton.”

Sutton finished sending her text. “Look, I care about you and Adena. And I'm not leaving you alone right now.”

Kat gave in and Sutton ushered her back into the building.

 

 

Kat was going stir crazy in her apartment as she frantically searched the internet for any new information coming out of Paris. Jane and Sutton watched her from the table not exactly sure how to help. Jane encouraged her to take a break from the computer. 

Kat shook her head as she typed. “I can’t.”

“Yes, you can.” 

Kat found it hard to push back the tears clawing at her eyes. “You don’t understand. If I stop -- my mind. It goes to the worst possible place and I can’t. I just can’t.”

Sutton placed her hand over Kat’s to stop her from typing. For the first time in a while, Kat glanced up from the screen at her friend. She could see the concern etched in her face. Sutton moved her hand to Kat's shoulder, “What would Adena want you to do?” 

Kat considered Sutton's question.

It seemed as if Sutton said the right thing. Kat released her grip on the laptop and rubbed her face before standing and heading to her and Adena’s bedroom. She closed the door to the room and dialed Adena’s mother. “Kat? Have you heard from her.”

“Unfortunately, No. I called the airline and she didn’t make any connecting flight.” There was a deafening silence on the other end. Kat had to check her cell to make sure the line remains connected after what seemed like an eternity if silence. “She’s alive.” She believed it. She did. She had to because the alternative didn’t make any sense.

“Of course she is.”

Kat and Mrs. El Amin spoke for a little longer trying to keep one another positive. Kat ended the call with a decision to somehow make it to France if she doesn’t hear anything more between now and tomorrow morning. 

 

 

 

The phone echoed loud through the apartment in the dead of night. Kat’s body reacted, popping up reflexively at the piercing tone. She unceremoniously shoved Jane off her and reached across Sutton to grab her cell. “Hello?” 

A man with a French accent replied, “May I speak to Kat Edison?” her heart stopped for a moment. “Yes, this is she.” There was a rustling sound then silence. “Hello?”

“Kat?” It was Adena.

“Adena? Baby where are you? Are you okay?” Kat crawled out of the bed and made her way to the living room to sit on the couch. 

“I’m okay.”

“You don’t sound okay.” She sounded different, smaller, tired.

“I have a few bruises, nothing remotely serious.” There was a momentary pause before “Are you drunk?” came through the line. Adena could hear a slur to a couple of her words.

“No. Sutton gave me a Xanax to help me sleep. I’ve never taken Xanax. She kept saying you’re on 100 and I need for you to come down to a 15. I don’t know what she meant because I'm always calm and rational.” Kat couldn't see the smile that made a short appearance on her girlfriend's face.“Before you say anything. I know not to take drugs from strangers. But Sutton isn’t a stranger.”

“Not where I was going with that?”

Tears of relief pricked the corners of Kat’s eyes. “I’m really glad you’re alive.” 

“I am too.” 

Adena sounded so far away. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

Kat got comfortable and laid down on the couch, cradling the phone to her ear. “And you can never scare me like that again.”

“It’s high on my list of things not to do again.”

Jane and Sutton came into the living room to check on Kat. They could hear the relaxed conversation she was having with Adena and knew their friend would be fine. They returned to bed.

“Have you spoke to your family.”

“I talked to maman right before I called you. She wants me to come home.” 

“We were losing it trying to reach you. How are you really?”

“I wish I was home.” 

“When can you leave?”

“I’m flying out on the first available flight I can get. It may be another day or two if I can’t catch a flight today.” 

“Well, I’m going to catch a flight out as soon as I can.”

“Why would you do that?”

“What do you mean, why? Because I want to see you with my own two eyes. And if you’re going to Iran, I don’t want to wait another week or more to see you.”

“Baby, you misunderstand. I’m going home to you.”

 

 

“Talk to me about something, anything.” Adena wanted to hear a familiar, comforting voice but she could hear the sleepiness in Kat’s. “but not if you're too tired?”

“I’m not tired at all.” They both knew it was a lie but it didn’t matter. “Sutton and Jane are sleeping over. Apparently, I can’t be trusted not to do something impulsive where you’re concerned.”

Adena imagined Kat spooning her as she closed her eyes and listened to her voice. “What would’ve you done?”

“Oh, I would be on somebody’s plane by now.”

“I wish you were here right now,” Adena whispered.

“I will do it. Just say the word.”

“No, love but I do enjoy knowing you would if I needed you.”

 

 

Adena was able to get a seat on the last flight to New York. She was waiting standby when a last-minute cancellation came. She closed her eyes and said thank you. 

 

 

Adena’s face held a genuine but exhausted smile as she exited the plane and saw Kat among the prongs of nameless faces. 

The moment Kat caught sight of her she moved swiftly through the crowd, sidestepping anyone who dared slow her down. 

Adena reveled in protective arms as her girlfriend pulled her in close and hugged her tight. Adena held Kat, in turn, allowing a brief moment of feeling her and breathing her in before moving towards the exit. Kat was happy to hold Adena as long as she would let her. She needed to hold her. She was here, alive, safe. She was home and Kat could breathe. Adena took a deep breath and rubbed Kat’s back. “Take me home.”

“Wait, where’s your other bag?” 

“Who knows?”

Kat took Adena’s camera bag and slung it over her shoulder and placed her arm around her as they exited the airport to hail a taxi.

 

 

 

 

Adena went straight to the shower after making it home. She took her time as she turned the temperature of the water to the highest she could stand. She dressed in light prayer linen and went to the spare room. She rolled out her pray rug in the sanctioned direction. She kneeled and began her prayer. She didn't get far into her prayer before a tide of emotions hit her. The last 24 hours have been a whirlwind. She cried. She cried tears of pain. She cried for the lives lost. She cried for the fear she felt - feels. Then there were tears of relief. She was alive and safe and home. 

 

Kat could hear her crying on the other side of the door. She wasn’t sure what to do. Adena was praying but she was in pain and she didn’t understand her role in this. She knew her gut reaction so she followed it. 

She kneeled in front of Adena sure not to touch her prayer rug or head coverings. “Ada.”

No one called her that anymore except her mother. Adena looked up and Kat was holding out her hands to take. 

She folded the corner of the prayer rug, and took her head covering down, and took Kat’s hands. They stood together as she leads them into their bedroom to lie down.

Kat wiped the tears from her face and kissed her.

“I’m going to crowd your space, is that okay?” Adena nodded. Kat threw the full length of her leg over Adena’s and wrapped a secure arm around her form. She didn’t want to let her go. 

She held her the rest of the night as they lie in bed. Adena cried herself to sleep in Kat's arms. Kat followed soon extremely grateful to have her home in her arms, safe.

 

Kat woke up early than usual and decided she wanted to do something nice for her girlfriend. She called Adena’s mother. It was 5 am her time which meant it was the early afternoon over there. She talked to her briefly before showering, leaving a note in case Adena woke up, and headed for the market. 

Upon her return, she laid out all the ingredients on her list on the kitchen counter. Taking a sip of her coffee from her favorite local cafe, she began making the obligatory calls to let everyone know Adena was home. She went into the bedroom to check on Adena. She remained asleep. Kat returned to the kitchen and Skyped Mrs. El Amin. 

She wanted Adena to have something more substantial. She ate far less than she should when stressed but her mother's cooking was always the one exception to that rule. Even though her mom wasn’t here maybe she could give her the next best thing.

Mrs. Well Damon walked her through the prep and cooking process. Egg getting was mostly complete, now it was about time. It needed to cook through.

Kat dipped the serving spoon into the pot, careful to extract a little to taste test. Her face contorted at initial contact. “Should the limes be this bitter?”

“Yes, that’s what we want.”

“Kat?” 

“Hmmm.”

“Thank You for taking care of her.”

Kat ducked her head to avoid eye contact with Mrs. El Amin. She felt embarrassed at the compliment and she didn't know why. Kat regained her composure to look at Adena's mother through the screen. “I love her,” that wasn’t news to anyone especially Adena's mother. “You do. I know this.” 

“And I do plan to be part of her life as long as she lets me.” 

“Kat, what are saying?”

“I'm saying…” Kat got distracted by a sound from the bedroom. “She’s calling me, I have to go.” Kat shut off the video call, turned down the eye on the stove. 

 

 

A blast goes off. The foundation shakes, debris flies, screams ensue. Chaos. 

The force of blast knocks her to the ground. She’s slightly disoriented. She finds a way to stand among the herd of people moving in all directions. She clutches her camera bag to her chest and tries to find her way to safety. She had no idea what to do next but keep moving. She didn’t see the bomb go off, her back was turned. She couldn’t believe she was right there. She was standing there and if the bomb had gone off a minute earlier it could have been her.

Adena considers removing her hijab. She takes in how people are looking at her and can’t decipher if it’s because she looks shell shock or if it was because she was identifiably Muslim. She considers her safety but she also considers her pride. More than anything she wishes she was home. She never felt so alone.

She jolted upright. “Kat,” she called.

Kat rushed in and sat next to her. Adena didn’t say anything, only reached out for her. Kat held her and asked if she wanted to talk about it. “Not right now,” Adena mumbled into Kat’s shoulder.

 

 

Adena sunk her spoon into the fragrant substance and took a mouth full. She paused for a moment then continued on. There was no way Kat, her beautiful girlfriend, made this. “Stop. You didn’t make this. Where are the containers? You ordered from some new place.” From her seat, she scanned the kitchen for the tell tell signs of takeout.

“Sorry, my love. All me,” Kat shrugged with a lopsided grin.

Adena’s eyes narrowed in skepticism.

“...With your mom’s help.”

Adena's eyes softened revealing a sweet smile for her love before returning to her stew.

 

 

“How is my Arus?” Mrs. El Amin asked her daughter.

“Maman you know you can’t make us married simply because you say it so.”

“Humor me.”

Adena knew there was no point in arguing. Her mom’s shorthand for Kat’s position in her life didn’t bother Adena. In fact, it did the opposite. It made her heart swell. She longed for this. This openness and acceptance with her mother and her love. She wanted what her brother automatically had with her parents. The freedom to gush about her relationship and have her family want to know. To ask, to care, to not worry about shaming them but she was concerned it may sound like pressure to Kat. 

It’s funny. Kat once said she would be one to mess up their relationship. She declared more than once that relationships were not something she was good at. But from where Adena was sitting nothing about her statement rang true. Kat's heart was huge and her love was infectious and Adena never stood a chance. 

“Thank you for helping her with the gormeh sabzi. It was almost better than yours.”

“Watch your tongue child.”

Adena and her mother laughed. This was what she needed and she appreciated all the kind in her life.

They spoke for a few more minutes before her mother insisted she get more rest. Adena clicked off Kat’s phone remembering she needs to replace hers.

“Something's got you all smiles,” Kat commented on her way to the kitchen to finish the dishes. “What are you thinking about?”

“Nothing. I got off the phone with my maman. She's still at it.” 

“In what way?”

“She called you her daughter in law.” Adena waited for a reaction. 

“Oh.”

“‘Oh’, that’s all you’re going to say?”

“We should be glad she even likes me right?”

“What happened to my girlfriend?”

Kat's tone shifted from playful to serious. “I’ve been reminded there are worse things than your mom wanting us to be married.”

 

 

Kat scanned twitter on her laptop while Adena lay curled up beside her drinking a cup of tea. 

News reports of a white supremacist who traveled across state lines for the intended purpose of killing a black man. He wanted to know what it felt like. 

A Muslim ban announced.

Charlottesville. Tiki torch nazis.

The man who was murdered trying to stop an assault on a Muslim woman.

Another cop acquitted of killing an unarmed Black person.

Kat didn’t know what more she could do without losing herself. She donates money. She makes a point to educate herself about the issues. But this onslaught of never-ending horrors was taking its toll.

“No more.” Adena closed the laptop and took it from Kat’s lap placing it on the coffee table. She began to re-arrange the furniture causing Kat to question her. “Babe, what are you doing?”

Adena pushed the coffee table off to the side. “Building a pillow fort. Help me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know, does this need an epilogue?


	16. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A proposition of sorts

Their makeshift pillow fort wasn’t that bad if you asked Adena. Kat thought it was one breath away from collapsing on top of their heads. It didn’t matter either way because project fort had served its purpose. Kat was no longer focused on the ills of the world, in fact, the outside world was not allowed to enter the pillowed/blanketed space. No talk of work or isms or pain of any kind, those were the rules. 

Adena was propped on her elbow angling down making out with Kat. 

Adena pulled away teasingly from the kiss. Kat blinked up with a relaxed smile. “Marry me,” slipped off her tongue effortlessly. 

Kat noticed Adena’s stillness as though she was deciphering what she heard. 

Adena stared down at her girlfriend surprised by the question. Silence hung between them for what seemed like an eternity for Kat.

This silence was different, however. Kat didn’t feel threatened by it. Maybe it was a sign of growth on her part, maybe it was the way the artist was quietly taking her in.

Adena chest filled with a warmth that she recognized as love. She looked down into beautiful big round eyes. Kat was everything she wanted. “No.”

“No?” Kat’s brow crinkled, visibly confused.

“Adena’s reiteration of “No” was gentle yet sure.

“Didn’t see that coming.” Kat didn’t know what to make of Adena’s response. She thought she was giving her what she wanted it.

Adena framed Kat’s face with her hand and fingered the curls at the edge of her temple. “I would love to marry you but you’re only proposing because you’re scared. I went through a scary thing that freaked both us out but that’s no reason to get married. I want you to want to marry me because you wholeheartedly want it and not because of fear.”

Kat understood the point her girlfriend was making but it wouldn’t be fair to say that was the only reason she was proposing. Kat took hold of the hand at her temple and held it. Adena’s hands always felt soft, delicate, and sure within hers. Holding any part of Adena always reminded Kat they belonged to each other. Kat had always wanted to belong with someone. She spent so much time alone in her life she didn’t think it was possible for her to fit so well with someone. “I was terrified in a way that I have never been before and the fear of losing you in such a permanent way forced me to see what was always there. I already told you, me not wanting to marry you had nothing to do with you or our relationship. The hard truth is I didn’t think our relationship would survive.”

“You’re in a relationship you’re convinced will fail?” Adena began to pull her hand away but Kat kept it in place. 

“Yes and No. I don’t consciously walk around thinking we’re going to end. I love you without question and love being with you in every way.” Kat’s grip released once she realized Adena had relaxed. “But I realized after you broke up with me, how much my resistance to marriage was about not wanting things to change. I didn’t want things to change and I lose you. I lost you anyway. But even then I could rationalize it. It’s easier to deal with a failed dating relationship than a failed marriage.” Kat’s eyes flickered away from the artist’s eyes for a moment before returning her gaze and lifting her hand to cup Adena’s face. “Then a bomb went off in an airport and none of it mattered anymore.” Kat searched Adena’s eyes needing her to really hear her. “I would rather marry you and have it fail than not and regret it.”

Adena pressed her forehead into her girlfriend’s and kissed her. “Ask me again when you aren’t scared. Or not. I told you I’m not going anywhere.”

“I’m not asking you again. I’m going to assume we’re engaged until we discuss a wedding date or you say otherwise.” 

Adena could see the surge of confidence wash over her love. “You’re a cocky motherfucker.”

Kat rolled Adena to her back and challenged her. “Tell me you don’t love me.”

Adena rolled her eyes and smirked. 

“Tell me you don’t want to marry me.”

Instead, Adena cupped Kat by the ears and pulled her into her body for a kiss.

Kat broke the kiss and teasingly pulled away. Then with all of the confidence of a top said, “Tell me you don’t want your fiance to fuck you right now.” 

Adena began reaching between their bodies to unbutton and push down Kat’s pants.

Kat smirked as she let Adena pull her shirt over her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fin


	17. Inversion II ( a drabble that didn't make the cut)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a drabble that was to be named Inversion II. I don't remember why I didn't post it. I think I forgot I wrote it. It's not much but it would fit after chapter 12. If you get something from it great, if not ignore it. It doesn't change the story much if at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again, everyone. Now, I look forward to reading everybody else's great stories.

The trip home was quiet but peaceful. There was no underpinning tension or conflict waiting to be detonated like a bomb. 

Adena offered to cook but Kat suggested they order in instead. Kat ordered a veggie pizza with portobello mushrooms and spinach. Adena prepped a salad and Kat took the time to change into her nighttime wear. 

The twosome ate in silence while they watched a Netflix movie. 

 

Kat woke in the middle of the night with Adena asleep leaning against her side. 

She slipped from underneath her and went to the bathroom. When she returned, Kat found the living room empty and the television off. 

Kat went to her room and upon finding it empty turned to head for the spare. Adena was in bed, lying down but not yet asleep. She was staring at the wall.

Kat was leaning against the threshold of the room feeling torn. What she wanted lie15 feet away and while it may have seemed obvious she didn’t know what she was going to do until she did it. Kat forced her feet to move.

Adena blinked up at Kat when she saw the woman she loved in her favorite oversized sleeping shirt. Kat stood in front of her, took hold of her hand, and guided them both back to their bed.

“I wasn’t sure if you were ready.”

I don’t know that I am.”

 

Kat opened her eyes, blinking a few times before focusing on the ceiling of her bedroom. She stretched and noticed Adena in her peripheral lying next to her, staring.

Kat took hold of her wrist pulling Adena close into her body. Adena’s body molded into Kat’s as her head laid atop her shoulder and arm circled her waist. 

Kat closed her eyes, relishing the softness of Adena's body and the tenderness of her touch as she stroked her side.

Kat’s breathing slowed and even out, signaling to Adena she was falling back asleep. Adena reached up, placed a hand to Kat’s cheek, and kissed her jawline before resettling. Her eyes closed relaxing into the reassuring sound of her girlfriend’s breathing.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback welcomed


End file.
